Dialogue

In our ongoing efforts to encourage the flow of meaningful communication, answer often asked questions, and share information and ideas that may be of value to visitors to this site, we have established Dialogue. Now in its second phase, Dialogue is a compendium of email exchanges between ourselves and persons who visit this site. We will be updating this feature about every six months.

To qualify for inclusion in Dialogue, emails must make relevant commentary, ask a question not already asked and answered, or offer some ideas or concepts that we believe will be of interest to others. Only the sender’s first name and age (if provided) will appear with an email; all other personal information, including email address, will be extracted from the communication before it is added to Dialogue. If you send us an email and you prefer that it not be included in Dialogue, simply tell us so in the email – we honor all such requests.

Please note that I do not have direct internet access. For the present, until I am released from prison, I am able to communicate via email only with Barbara’s help. When communication is most urgent we do this by telephone, and otherwise, most often, by regular mail. Bear this in mind if you send me an email with the hope of receiving a reply. I generally answer all of the personal emails I receive, but I may not be able to answer yours as quickly as you may be accustomed to, so please be patient.

If you have a question someone else has not thought to ask, a story or concept you wish to share, or you just want to get something off your chest, email me. I look forward to reading what’s on your mind.

Bobby BeauSoleil

I’m 41 yrs old, and have been following this story since i was 16. i have done some research and found that the average time spent in jail for murder is 8-10 yrs, so how is it possible that bobby has spent over 30 yrs in jail? what are his chances of getting out in the not to distant future? again thank you for taking the time to answer my e-mail.
Bill

That's a good question, Bill, to which there is no easy answer. It could be argued that the Manson association is at least partly responsible for this incomprehensible situation. But there is no way of knowing this for sure, because other prison inmates with life sentences under the California system's jurisdiction are being treated in exactly the same way, and have been for the past dozen years or so. There has been a virtual moratorium on parole for lifers during that time. We are all hoping that the new Schwarznegger administratin will institute more sensible policies.

I continue to be confident in my belief that I will be paroled in due course. A lot of people are pulling for me, and I approach the future with optimism.

Bobby

Hi, Bobby,
I was just reading some of the accomplishments you've made while "on the inside" and want to commend you for not letting the walls crush your creative spirit. I am currently on the road and have very little time, but I would love to learn more about your intervention with "at risk" youth. Also, could you tell me more about your video series that is aimed at breaking the cycle of recidivism.
Thank you so much and best of luck.
Carmen Hughes

Carmen,
Thank you for writing and for your kind thoughts. Unfortunately, I am not as active with the youth intervention programs as I was in years past. Budget cuts and a much more conservative (less progressive) prison administration has severely restricted the youth programs here. Very sad, because they were getting results. I worked with the Los Hermanos youth program for five years, and was on their board of directors. I produced a viedo series that took the program into a number of public schools. I subsequently spent two years making a 40 minute video called "Life in a World Behind Bars: A story told by prisoners," which gives a very realistic and no-holds view of prison life, with candid commentary by prison inmates. This video is used in youth facilities and public schools, and has been used in staff training.

Most of the work I have done for programs aimed at reducing recidivism were done for Gordon Graham and Company. They develop very well-designed cognitive skills development programs. I directed and helped to develop most of the videos used for these cognitive skills development programs, such as the Breaking Barriers and On Solid Ground programs. The best way to learn more about them is to contact Gordon Graham and Company. They have a web site, but I don't have the URL on hand. A search on Google should turn up the contact information.

Thanks again for writing.

Bobby

I am a recent law school graduate, but my under grad work was in film, music production. I would love to learn more about the series you are doing on kids at risk. I believe the children today as in any era are influenced and are trying to express how they feel through their music.

There is so much anger in the youth today which are being expressed through the music but it does not seem to be getting through to anyone. Unfortunately it is the underprivileged children who suffer the most.

I worked at the juvenile division of the Detroit Prosecutors office last summer and it became clear if they are not reached by age 8 or 9 they are confirmed to a life in prison.

Please send me information on your current projects.
Margaret

Hi Margaret,

Thank you for your interest. Unfortunately, budget cuts and administrative policy changes have resulted in the suspension of the video productions program here at the institution, as well as rather severe reductions in the level of support given to the at-risk youth programs. These are troubling times. We hope that these changes are temporary, and that the programs will be restored to a higher level of activity at some point. For the required advocacy to manifest, the administration must recognize the value of these programs. We wait and hope.

There might be some value in contacting:

Los Hermanos Youth Program
c/o Staff Advisor
Oregon State Penitentiary
2605 State Street
Salem, OR 97310

The program, what remains of it, may still be using the video series I produced for them about four years or so ago, and you may be able to order a set from them. I have produced other videos targeting at-risk youth, but at this point I don't know how you might obtain copies of them. This is unfortunate, as they are higher quality and have demonstrated effectiveness. When the video program reopens, these videos will again be available.

As you have noted, disenfranchised youth is an ongoing tragedy of frightening magnitude. More prisons are being built for today's kids than schools. Prison inmates who have "been there" can be a valuable resource, but it will take everyone pulling together - the entire community at every level - to bring about effective and lasting change. Sadly, most of the people we look to for leadership in this area put most of their energy into making excuses, perpetuating the belief that such efforts are futile. It is not an exercise in futility, in my belief.

Good luck,
Bobby

Hi Bobby,
not quite sure if you' ll ever get a chance to read this but decided to give it a shot anyway! My name is Gus im 27 years old. I've followed your case within the manson case for a few years now reading books like Helter Skelter and others like it. The down side of it is, is that that you never know how much is true and how much is "romance" . Frustrating! You're to me one of the most interesting people in the case. You seem to be a very well put together guy. It's amazing to me how you've ended up where you have. What was it like? The time, the people, everything. What was "Sadie" like? I've visited the ranch several times. Looking for ghosts i guess. And my imagination just starts to run away with me. I start to imagine you guys there just living your lives in a time that seems so goddamn unreachable. Im horribly curious!! I hope this finds you. Thanks Bobby!
Gus

Hi Gus,

Thank you for your recent email.

I find it hard to believe that Spahn Ranch could still be there after all these years, as it was a relic when I knew it. You probably mean the location where it was. A long time ago I had heard that there were plans to build some sort of resort on the property, but I don't know if anything actually came of them.

I can certainly sympathize with your desire to know more about what actually happened with Charlie et al these many years ago. I understand your frustration. Most of what has been written has been exploitation - the events and the people seen through the eyes of fear and sold to a public with an insatiable lust for vicariously experienced violence and excitement. This applies to both Helter Skelter movies, as well of course. For me it is like seeing the events and the people I knew reflected in a funhouse mirror. This has deprived a great many people, such as yourself, an opportunity to understand what happened.

I remember Sadie as a young woman with an insatiable need for attention, regardless of consequences. But I really can't answer all the questions you have about the people and what happened, not like this anyway. I am working on a book that I hope will give you and others a better opportunity to get to know the people as I knew them, and the events we all became swept up in. Please be patient. However, check in on the site from time to time, as we will be updating it with new material on occasion.

Very best,
Bobby

I wanted to ask a question if you don't mind. Does your husband still stay in contact with any of the other manson member and what does he think about the movies that are made about all of them?  Does he regret ever being involved?

Ice Dixie

Ice Dixie,
Barbara forwarded your email to me so that I could answer your questions.

No, I have not maintained contact with Manson or any of his followers. All of that is ancient history to me now.

So far, the movies that have been made have been gross distortions of the story I know, and the people who were actually involved. I hope that one will be made that gives everyone a better representation of those people and events, one that encourages greater understanding.

Yes, I have deeply regretted my participation in the events of 35 years ago. At some point one must move beyond the regret and begin the process of mending. I have moved on.

Thank you for your interest,
Bobby

Greetings..!

Though I'm afraid my own musical proclivities do not extend to electronic practice, simply a general familiarization, I found myself quite interested in Bobby's take on the nature of sound, in general. I'm 33 and have been immersed, since i was a wee one, in the great arch of historical music from the Byzantine until our current times - (with, wince wince, a specialty in the "resistance" piano music of the Stalinist composer).

I wonder, Barbara, if you could pass on the following question.

Many "art" composers, particularly of European origin and training, chose electronic idioms, then - as they aged - returned to an expanded type of symphony orchestra, through which it's apparent that various instruments are treated in quasi-electronic ways. I'm speaking primarily of the "mobile" sounds of the Lutoslawski symphonies (2, 3, and 4), or the "aleatoric" interpretations of durations of note-groups (at time-intervals chosen by the performer!).

   This sort of music is extremely notated, and very precise, yet differs from other music of the European art tradition in that it returns some aspect of control to the actual players. The result is often luminous and shimmering; "waves" of soundgroups, orchestral, yet rather akin to the sound of windchimes, or even traffic - only placed within gorgeous, hugely glowing lyric contexts. Does Bobby read or write music, at all, and has he a familiarity with this  '60s development in Western music? The reason I ask, is that it seems to me that this sort of "performer-freedom" within a larger, *written* framework (i.e. the score!) is rather analogous in terms to the situation of a creative artist within the parametres of the prison system.

    There is plenty of great, lyrical music to be had in these pieces of music, and also plenty of awful theoretic treatises by musicologists on aleatory. Despite the strict processes of these symphonies, there's an incredibly radiant, luxurious freedom inside the structures, as well.

     Lutoslawski, before his death in '94, completed his 4th symphony, which is a summation of his life's work. Even the Pulitzer, though, does not make his name recognizable to those outside the field.

     Perhaps I shall forward some of these translucent recordings - the master himself, conducting - to Bobby.

Best wishes,

Roger

Hello Roger,

Thank you for sharing your interesting and thought provoking insights. I have nowhere near your diverse knowledge of musical traditions, and virtually no formal education in music. In fact, I have lived much of my life in a kind of musical vacuum, with only spotty exposure to music beyond the mainstream. This is part of the nature of the environment in which I have lived for three and a half decades. The one helpful asset this has given me is a compensatory inventiveness in my approach to music that may contribute a degree of originality to my compositions and performances.

The "art" composers you refer to may not have chosen electronic idioms by preference, initially, but rather out of expedience. Composers of instrumental music generally rely upon a diversity and complexity of timbres and voicings in lieu of lyrics vocalized by a human singer. For many, orchestras are simply out of reach. Electronic instruments provide a shortcut to a broad sonic palette, and a way to perform complex arrangements with small ensembles, or even single-handedly. This is certainly true in my case, although I did develop a passion for the electronic medium as well, in the course of becoming familiar with it. However, if I were given an opportunity to compose for a real symphony orchestra I would jump on it in a heartbeat.

I am able to read and write traditional music notation, if rather haltingly. I prefer to compose using a MIDI sequencer, which provides the option of composing using traditional notation for pitch, duration and dynamics, along with a sort of "piano roll" style method that serves the same purpose, with translation between the two methods, both of which can be combined with input via direct real time performance.

If you have not yet heard examples of my music, recordings are available online at www.whitedogmusic.com. Some .mp3 format recordings are available as free downloads from the site, though most people find the CDs much more satisfying.

Your description of Lutoslawski's symphonies are fascinating. I wish you could send me some recorded examples, but this is not allowed by prison rules. The concept of "aleatoric" interpretations is especially intriguing. Although I am certain the styles are vastly different, my own compositions generally begin as frameworks for spontaneous performances.

Thanks again for sharing your thoughts.

Best,
Bobby

Bobby (or Barbara),

I felt compelled to write to you today.  I stumbled upon an interview that you did where you talked about, and I got to know, the person you were before the events that led to your incarceration.  I have always (unfortunately) had a weird fascination with the "Manson Family" and had always considered you to be a deeply connected part of that group.  Until, that is, I read more  about you.  I must say that I am relieved to know that you weren’t some awful, horrible monster as you have always been shown to be.  I am a middle aged woman who feels as if I have been living in my own prison for so many years.  Only I have no release date, nor a date for a parole hearing.  I have come to find that the hardest job that I may face is "finding myself".  Realizing why I'm here and what my meaning and purpose is on earth.  I am also deeply moved by music, and find it most times to be a stabilization tool.  In fact, it is usually the only thing that calms me and helps me rationalize with this world that I live in.  Unfortunately, I am not musically inclined.  I just want to say that your story has touched me, and thank you.  You did not succumb to the world in which you found yourself (prison).  You have made a difference in other's lives and you have managed to continue learning as well as to become a teacher of sorts.  Anyway, I hope that you are able to receive this...because your story did reach and touch me.

Butter Fly

Butter Fly,

Thank you so much for writing. I appreciate knowing that my story has touched you in a meaningful way. I empathize with the feelings you express regarding the nature of your own life. I recommend that you keep searching those feelings for the keys to your own liberation. After all, butterflies do emerge from their prisons, and I truly believe that you will ultimately realize the freedom of your namesake.

You mention music as a stabilizing and healing tool. A few years ago I composed and recorded a piece of music entitled "Mantra" that many people swear by for just this purpose, which was in fact the purpose it was composed for. It is available online (or by mail order) at www.whitedogmusic.com. You will find my other CD titles there as well.

I wish you good health.
Bobby

Dear Bobby,

My name is Dan and I hail from Holden, MA.  Let me just say first off I am not going to waste your time with questions or comments regarding Manson or Tate/Labianca.  Although I was introduced to your music when I heard excerpts from Lucifer Rising in the documentary Charles Manson Superstar, am an avid collector of Manson memorabilia and have my own opinions and views on the whole case, I will keep it all to myself as I understand your degree of lack of relevance to said case.  I can understand how frustrating it can be when everybody has the wrong idea about you and doesn't stop hounding you about it.  I would just like to tell you that I received the Lucifer Rising soundtrack just this morning and was blown away.  I can't begin to say how inspiring it is to hear something so beautiful and hypnotic come from someone in such a constrictive situation.  I don't know how familiar you are with various subgenres of rock, but I am the frontman for an unstable glam/punk band called Fist Socket.  I can write decent lyrics when inspiration hits me, but it seems to hit me less and less lately.  Also, it's a real bitch trying to find bandmates who share in my plans and are willing to go as far as I am.  As a musician and recording artist, what advice can you offer to someone in such a situation?  Also, if you are at all interested, I would like to send you some of my lyrics just to get a bit of constructive criticism from someone with talent and experience.  They're a little on the harsh, angry side just to warn you.  I hope to hear from you soon. 

Dan

Hi Dan,

Thanks for writing to let me know how much you are enjoying my recordings for the Lucifer Rising soundtrack. You may be interested in knowing that a deluxe edition double-CD release of the Lucifer Rising soundtrack (professionally pressed and packaged, not a CD-R) will be hitting store shelves on June 15, 2004. It is being released on the Arcanum label, and they did a great job putting it together. The second disk contains some excerpts from my earlier work, including the long-lost recording I did for the film back in 1967, and an alternate version from the later 70s recordings that did not make the cut (though some people like it even more than the actual soundtrack). There is also a 28-page booklet with lots of photos, an intro by Kenneth Anger, and a history of the project by Michael Moynihan. The release will be available on the White Dog Music site (www.whitedogmusic.com), as well as on Amazon, and numerous other places, including (a first for me, other than the bootlegs) record stores.

It is, as you say, "a real bitch" to find bandmates with common aspirations and goals, and hopefully the right talents. The only advice I can offer is to keep looking. And when you find any likely candidates, be willing to listen and incorporate their unique contributions (unless you can afford to pay them to shut up and do what you say), because that is what musical collaboration is all about.

You may email me some of your lyrics and I'll take a look at them. I don't know what feedback I could offer that might be of value to you. Remember, I do mostly instrumental music.

Thanks again,
Bobby

DEAR BOBBY,

     I THINK ALOT ABOUT YOUR LIFE STORY. WHERE YOU WERE, AND WHERE YOU ARE TODAY. THE 60'S WERE SO CHAOCTIC. PLUS LSD IS SUCH A POWERFUL DRUG. ITS HARD FOR PEOPLE TO UNDERSTAND THAT CHAOS, AND LSD DON'T REALLY GO TOGETHER VERY WELL. WHO IS TO BLAME? THE TRUTH IS WE ALL ARE.

 I DON'T BELIEVE MURDER IS RIGHT IN ANY WAY. I AM NOT A JUDGE. I SEE HERE IN NEW YORK PEOPLE GETTING AWAY WITH MURDER EVERYDAY. EITHER THAT OR THEY GET OUT IN 10 YEARS. WHY ARE YOU ANY DIFFERENT?

 LIFE IS SO STRANGE , BUT BEAUTIFUL. EVERY MINUTE OF LIFE IS SO PRECIOUS. THE REAL TRIP IS REALITY, LOL!!!!!!!!! I'M SO SERIOUS. REALITY IS THE BIGGEST TRIP.

 I THINK ITS GREAT YOUR REACHING OUT TO HELP OTHERS. THATS WHAT ITS ALL ABOUT. I THINK THATS WHAT WE WERE PUT ON THIS EARTH TO DO. THERES NOTHING LIKE REACHING OUT TO ANOTHER HUMAN BEING, WITH NO STRINGS ATTACHED.

 I USED TO TOUR WITH THE GRATEFUL DEAD. AM I A DEAD HEAD? I WILL ALWAYS BE A HEAD, AND THE WAY THEY TAUGHT ME TO LIVE AND LOVE OTHERS.I LOVE ALL MUSIC. I AM A MUSIC JUNKIE. I NEVER THOUGHT THAT THOSE DAYS WERE GOING TO EVER END. I THOUGHT JERRY WOULD LIVE FOREVER.  IT JUST GOES TO SHOW THAT WE REALLY BETTER MAKE THE MOST OF THIS THING CALLED LIFE.

 I JUST FELT LIKE DROPPING YOU A LINE. IF YOU EVER WANT TO I'D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU. BE WELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!                        

  :) LEAH

Hi Leah,

Thank you for writing.

May I offer a bit of advice? Avoid using all caps when you write. IT MAKES IT SEEM LIKE YOU'RE SHOUTING!

Otherwise, it's a treat to hear from a Dead head. I would not go so far as to refer to myself by that term, but I've always loved the Dead. I had the pleasure of living near them in the Haight back in the day, and there were a couple of occasions when me and my bandmates in The Orkustra played gigs with the Dead.

It is sad that Jerry is no longer in a condition to give us more of his great music, because he's truly Dead. But he gave us so much, he and the band, so much good music and so many good times. He will always be a part of what we do, and for that we can be truly Grateful.

You be well too.

Bobby

I am a college student doing some research on the Manson Family. I am trying to track down and figure out the best books to refer to (that was actually written by someone in the family).
Thank you for your time and any help that you may offer.
Nikki

Nikki,
I'm afraid that I can't help you much in your quest. The books by Susan Atkins and Charles Watson were obviously motivated by some evangelical agenda. When I looked at them there was little that resonated as honest to me. The book "Manson in His Own Words" appears to contain some of Manson's words, but much is license taken by the author, making the whole thing more than a little suspect. The best one, so I've been told (I have not read it), is "My Life With Charlie" by Paul Watkins. This book is out of print, and you may have some difficulty finding a copy.

I am presently working on a book that will offer my unique perspective on the events in question, and the people involved. There is still much work to do on it, and unless you are slower at your college studies than I am at writing books, it is unlikely to be of value to you in your research. Meanwhile the interviews on the site may be of some help.

Good luck,
Bobby

Dear Bobby--

How do you live with the unspeakable horrors of that time??  Didn't something tell you all that there was something terribly wrong with Mr. Manson and the others and that the acid was dangerous? You all could have been so much more.  I pray for all of you and the dead.  I mean no offense--rather I want to understand.  Help me understand.  Did you watch the movie on CBS Sunday evening??  Was it accurate??  Was the acting pretty decent?

I appreciate your reply, sir.  thank-you.

Mary

Dear Mary,

I understand your desire to understand. Had you gone deeper into the site than you apparently did, and read the interviews, articles, and Dialogue, some of your questions would have been answered.

Yes, I forced myself to watch the remake of the Helter Skelter movie on CBS last Sunday. If the real Charles Manson had behaved as he was portrayed in the movie, no one would have had anything to do with him. The same is true of most of those represented as characters in the film. The acting was less of a problem than a script that was crippled at birth by a mean-spirited interpretation of the events and the people who were involved in them. The one aspect of the film that seemed fairly accurate to me, as with the book it was based on, is Vincent Bugliosi's opinion of himself and his relationship with the world in which he lived at the time.

One day a book will be written that will help you to reach a better understanding of those horrible tragedies. And perhaps a movie will be based on it. Until then, avoid being too quick to believe what some would have you believe.

Bobby

Dear Mr Beausoleil,

I've just finished reading Helter Skelter for the 4th time.  What a remarkable story and what a remarkable change you've made in your life.  It is commendable that you have used your time in the system to better yourself-to create, rather than to harbor resentment towards the society that you once seemed to shun.  I was born the year you were incarcerated, so it is hard for me to relate to those turbulent times, but I feel that we are rapidly moving towards turbulent times once again.  I hope that your program of outreach to young people continues to be successful, it's important.  I'm a musician too, and I truly believe that music, the arts, creating...those are the only things that truly teach compassion, and that appears to be what you have learned, and more importanly, what you're passing on.  I hope that is what your legacy is.  Good luck to you and keep doing what you're doing.

Most sincerely,

Dail

Dear Bobby

I just stumbled across your website while during a bit of research about the 70's. You have been through a lot over the years, and have done a lot of prison time. We all make mistakes in life, and you seem to be be doing a lot of positive things in your life at the moment. I hope things work out for you.

Keep the faith and be positive.

Regards

Daniel

I saw your web page and am very intrigued by all you have accomplished.  I just wanted to let you know there are people out here that think your efforts to improve yourself are remarkable.      Keep up the good work!

 God Bless

Amy

 
Hi there,
Firstly, my name is Ksenya and I am a teenager from Sydney, Australia. I realise you most probably haven't updated your website in years, but I just wanted to email you in the hope that you might receive it!
I only heard about Charles Manson a few weeks ago, and was so intrigued by what I had heard that I went on to read various accounts of the Manson Family, and stumbled across your website. I just find it so amazing how some people can change so much, like your husband, and you two do so much with your lives. And it also amazes me how some people DON'T change - like Charlie. Although, I believe that he is just perceived to me some kind of maniac, and in fact everyone is a maniac in their own right, and there is no right or wrong way of being.
Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that you and your husband are a huge inspiration to me, and that I can only dream of achieving as much as you two.
 
Cheers,
Ksenya
 
 

I am so glad you have had a productive life, even though it has been in prison. Is there any chance you will ever get out? I personally think anyone that has ever been associated with Charles Manson is doomed just because of the connection. Society doesn't want to know that a "family member" might be walking the streets, god forbid. I'm sure you have long paid your debts to society, so for whatever it is worth, I wish you and your family all the good luck you could hope for.

Take Care

Victoria

Such words of encouragement are always welcome, and I am very grateful for the sentiments. They are strong indicators that understanding, compassion and forgiveness are possible when given the opportunity and fertile ground in which to grow. I like to believe there is a possibility they may eventually extend to the parole board, leading to my being allowed to go home to my loved ones.

It has been awhile since we updated the site, and we are planning to do so in the near future. One of the things that have changed is my involvement with youth outreach programs. Although some of the videos I have made are still being used in schools and youth facilities, at present I am not directly involved with any formal youth intervention programs. This development was not by my personal choice. A combination of fiscal conservatism and changes in the guiding philosophies within the administration of the prison where I live has resulted in severe cuts to the youth programs at this institution. This development is tragic - and hopefully temporary. I continue to believe in the value of these programs. The reenfranchisement of today's young people is essential to living in a safe and sane world tomorrow. An integral part of this process, particularly for young people who are at risk of gang involvement or already in gangs, is an opportunity to learn from persons who have made serious mistakes, and who have learned from the consequences of those mistakes. In this way it may be possible for at least some at-risk young people to avoid some of the many pitfalls in their path. This benefits everyone.

My story will remain on the web site, and will be updated from time to time. Open forums are also planned. In this way my experiences may continue to be of value to active youth outreach programs, and to other who may benefit from learning about them.

Thanks again for the encouragement.

Bobby

I was just curious if you seen the two helter skelter films, and if so which one was the closest to reality. It seemed to me that the second film was a little far fetched. Anyways thanks.

No, it was the first Helter Skelter movie that was a little far-fetched. The second one came from another planet completely.
Bobby

Dear Mr. BeauSoleil,

I have read quite a bit about you and I think you are a very interesting person. I read that you have recieved inquiries about your life, and it seems like you prefer not to respond, but what I want to ask you has nothing to do with what you have previously been questioned about. I should tell you that I saw this on a website having to do with....well, you know, and I am not asking this for a school report or any other reason, just for me. I saw a picture of your Dodge Power Wagon and I was just wondering how it became a posession of someone who puts pictures of it on the websites like it's a source of fame. I know this seems like a strange question, but if you have time, I would like to hear from you.

Sincerely,

Katie

Dear Katie,

Actually, it's not a strange question at all. I find it interesting.

First, however, I have a question for you. If it is true as you say that I "prefer not to respond" to inquiries about my life, how is it you came to know so much about me? I am working on making my life more of an open book.

Regarding your question. I don't know how the person you mention came to be in possession of my old Power Wagon, assuming it's the same one (actually, I had two of them for awhile). Why a photo of it would be put up on a web site is anyone's guess. There's a cool factor in those old trucks, if you're into that sort of thing. Maybe it's just a matter of pride. I would love to have a copy of the picture, if you would be willing to email one to me.

Thanks for your interest.

Bobby

 
Hi again,
 
Thank you so much for taking the time to reply to my email! It really got me thinking - why are you still in jail? I just don't understand how someone like you who is so obviously "reformed", as they like to say, is still in jail while others go to prison for a few years, are released and simply return to jail soon anyway, after committing another crime. Keeping someone in jail should be, really, to help them see that they have done something "wrong", in the eyes of society, and help them to change their ways. So if they have changed, like you, how does it help to keep someone who is simply trying to make this world a better place, locked up?
 
There's always more than one side to the story, but it just doesn't seem logical to me.
 
Cheers,
Ksenya
 
 

Hi Ksenya,

Nobody seems to be able to answer that question in a manner that is truly satisfying. There are all the reasons you mentioned, why I should have been released long ago. Those seem to make sense to most people. The ones given for why not make little sense at all under close scrutiny. Some say it has to do with the level of fear in the world; US society seems to be most suseptible to that. Others say it's political (which probably ties in with the fear factor), while others say it's economic (which probably ties in with the political aspect). Trying to figure it all out hurts my head. Ultimately, all I can do is the best I can do to be the kind of person who can be considered of value in the world in which I live, and let the world respond as it will. I have long since come to terms with the fact that I can not "make" the world be the way I think it ought to be.

I wish you were on the parole board!

Thank you for your kind thoughts.

Bobby

Hello Bobby and Barbara!

   I came across your webpage and was highly impressed with your story. I am a 28 year old 2nd grade school teacher in West Virginia. I find it wonderful that you send such a positive message to prisoners that they can have such an active life even while incarcerated. I find your story very inspirational and (being a teacher) I was really impressed by your work with the Hermanos Youth Intervention Program and the general message of your website. Thank You and I hope you keep sharing your message and your story ! Thank you!

Sara

Hi Sara,

No, thank you! Your comments are very welcome. They give us heart.

Your work as a 2nd grade school teacher is important too, moreso than the work I've been involved in with teenage youth. It's in the earlier years that some children begin to feel disenfranchised and sink into patterns of withdrawal that can lead to serious troubles later. This happened with me. The quality of relationships between students and teachers plays a major role. It is easier to relate to the kids who are engaged and fail to notice the ones who are not, when it may well be that those with the most potential (both for achievement and trouble later in life) are children who seem bored, distracted and disinterested because they are not being challenged enough. No, I don't have any real world experience as a grade school teacher, but I once was such a student.

I shall do my best to continue putting out a positive message. It is not easy to remain actively creative and positive while in prison. One must fight for the opportunities and work hard to maintain them. I am determined to contribute meaningfully, even if all I have to work with is paper and pencil.

Thank you for the encouragement.

Bobby

Dear Mr. Beausoleil,

Hi. My name is Ali and I am 14 years old. For the past year and a half, I have become quite fascinated with "Charlie" and the family. I have both versions of the Helter Skelter movie. I came across your site and found your email address and just wanted to ask you a few questions. And I hope I am not bothering you. Do you regret what you did when with Charlie and the family? Have you spoken to Charlie or any members of the family since most of you all went to prison? How did you become part of the family and what was it like to be part of it?

This may sound "odd", but sometimes I feel like I just want to be Charlie and if not just be with the family, even though I do not even know any of you. As of now, would you want to be back with the family?

Again, I really hope I am not bothering you. If you can, please email me back as soon as possible.

  Sincerely,

     Ali

Dear Ali,

Thank you for writing.

The so-called "Manson Family" is a fiction of the media, and does not really exist but in the imaginations of some. What you say that you sometimes want to be a part of lives in ancient history, and what you've seen in the movies you mention or books you may have read are only distorted glimpses of what was. It would be unwise to put much credence to them.

Sure, I have had my share of regrets. You can read all about them on the web site. But one can't live in the past. Truly, that is simply not possible. It came time for me to move on, and my advice to you is to do the same.

With kind regards,
Bobby

Only Jesus can wash away the vile acts you committed. Confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe with your heart that he rose again and He will wash away our sins. Only He can set you straight, or else you will burn in hell like the rest of the MURDERERS you live with. Jesus truly accepts all.

David R.

Is this what Jesus would do?

Peace, brother.
Bobby

Yes as a matter of fact He holds all sinners accountable and when they accept Him He forgives them. He is the only thing that sets us free from the sin we commit here in our earthly lives. We all sin, however we can be made righteous from our sin and that is through the precious blood of the lamb. However, if we don't accept what He did on the cross for us, then our sins are counted against us. "The wages of sin is death." The Bible tells us that in the end the only thing that God will ask us is "What did you do with my son Jesus?" Our response will dictate if its the lake of fire or the Holy City for us. I'm going to the Holy City.
 
It is the only religion that doesn't require some earthly works, because Jesus did them already!
 
Jesus was never afraid to call a spade a spade and that is because Jesus IS LORD!
 
Peace to you.
David R.
 

Thank you, David. I appreciate that you have shared your beliefs with me. My point was that it is not our job to judge others as to who will or will not be forgiven by the Christ. We are human beings, and though we have a direct line to the divine, we are not divine. We don't always know - in fact, we rarely know - what is in the heart's of other men and women. I believe the Christ would have us assume that we are all forgiven, in the way that we treat one another.

Peace,
Bobby

 
 
 
Bobby,
 You are absolutely right, it is not our place to judge whats in the hearts of others. I think I like that point you made that Jesus would have us assume all are forgiven in the way that we treat one another. I apologize for coming off so harsh.
Thanks,
Peace to you. 
Dave
 

Your reply means a lot to me, David, especially as it was so unexpected. It was not my intention to change your beliefs in any way. Any exchange that leads to better understanding serves the truth, and anything that serves the truth serves the divine. I'm very grateful for this opportunity.
Peace,
Bobby

I have read "helter skelter" several times. --------- I found your since (version) of what happened to Hinman and the court's version interesting. I can understand the prosecutor had say what was required to get a conviction.  I hope you can get your parole soon; ---- I am also happy for you-----that you have been able to create such a rich life for your self.----- We are about the same age, and when I think about it, I came close to have gotten into some serious problems, when I was 20/21.---- could have gone to jail.     Hinman was an idiot not to made a good faith attempt to come up with the money. He should have never let things go so far. You can borrow, pawn, sell, etc.----- I would have said here is $ 2,000 ---- tell them I'm sorry.  -------------- best wishes,

Frank

Hi Frank,

Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me.

Now that you mention it, I have, as you say, created a rich life for myself. But not because my physical circumstances are so great - there's not much about the prison experience that I would call nice, generally, despite some opportunities for creative expression that I have been permitted to have on occasion. If pressed, I would say that the richness in my life springs from my inner landscape, and manifests most in the love and support of my relations and friends.

While I agree with you that Gary behaved stupidly in the situation we became caught up in, not so stupidly as I did. Everyone involved behaved stupidly in that tragedy of errors, but me most of all, from the time I became caught up in the shakey deal with the bikers, to rationalizing that Gary's stupidity was a good enough justification to rob him of his life to preserve my sacred liberty, to thinking I might be able to get away with it. That's just it. I could never run fast enough to escape myself, and the inevitable realization that there is never a valid justification for deliberate murder. That, my friend, is the hardest lesson I ever had to learn.

Bobby

Hi Bobby

My name is Kendyl. I am 24, and an art student in college.

I just visited your website and I really have to say that it is nice to see that you are doing what you love most. Your artwork is beautiful. I am glad that nothing is holding you back from expressing yourself through your music, and am especially glad that you have remained ambitious after all that you have experienced in your past. It is wonderful to see that you didn't resort to anger and loathing. Life is too short to live in hate.

I don't know what else to say really, other than that you should never give up what you love the most. I sincerely admire what you have made of yourself and only hope that you continue to do more. Although the past may be dark, you have created a light to brighten your future.

Thank you for taking your time to read my letter.

Sincerely

Kendyl

Dear Kendyl,

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings. You are so right, life is too short to live in hate. There have been some who have written to express their belief that because of my past failures I should not be permitted to create art and music, to share my work with others via the internet, or to experience the joys of loving relationships. I put myself in a very dark place, and bringing myself back into the light has been a long and difficult road. Expressing myself creatively has been an important part of the process. Everyone, I believe, has the potential to bring something meaningful and valuable to the world, even those of us who have made serious mistakes. I very much appreciate the validation you have given to my efforts, and I look forward to seeing the contributions you make through your own artistic and creative endeavors. I tend to think they will be significant, given your generous spirit.

Sincerely,
Bobby

Hello Bobby,

My name is Bjenny. I’m a musician, song writer and artist and avid reader. Over the years my interest in American culture of the 60's and 70's your name has popped up quite often. Originally I just dug the sound of your name and delved more into your life and have been both impressed and horrified.

Recent research (for personal, musical, artistic and historic interests) led me to your website and I just wanted to let you know that I admire all the positive things you have done in recent years and that you look healthy and happy. I’ve never written to anyone besides I didn’t know but I felt that I just had to get in contact to say hello and that I’m looking forward to getting into all your music that’s available.

Do you have an autobiography?

Are you always writing music?

Anyway just saying hello.

Peace, Bjenny

P.S Is it true you played in the band Love once?

Hi Bjenny,

Thank you for taking the time to write, and for your encouraging thoughts. I appreciate knowing that some of my history and endeavors are of interest to you.

In answer to your first question, no, I do not yet have a biography available. I have written parts of my memoirs, and someday I will finish them and publish them, but not for awhile yet. There's more life yet to live before I write my life story. I am, however, working on a book. It is called "The Family Jam" and it is about the music group of the same name that I was in for a time with Charlie Manson, Dennis Wilson, et al. It is a somewhat fanciful but nevertheless authentic account of the relationships and events that led to such a tragic end.

I compose music in phases. I'm also a visual artist, as well as a musician, and sometimes writer, and I generally focus on one of these modes of expression for months at a time, on an alternating basis.

Yes, I was once a member of Arthur Lee's band, for a brief period of time, but this was before the band's name was changed to Love. I convinced Arthur that he needed a rhythm guitarist in the band, creating that new position. But I played with them only for a couple of months before being replaced by Bryan. It was a good thing, because I left for San Francisco, where I subsequently formed my own band, The Orkustra - a ground-breaking ensemble.

The place to get my music is: www.whitedogmusic.com. New releases will be listed soon.

Peace to you too,
Bobby

Bobby,

How are you? I was wondering if we could be friends. What kind of music do you do. I would like to hear some. Where can I get some of your music to hear. You are alot better looking now than you were all those years ago. You got better with age.

 Hope to hear from you soon!

 Teresa

Teresa,

Some things do - wine, cheese, old furniture, and rock guitar players. Thanks for the compliment!

You can hear my music by visiting www.whitedogmusic.com, where you can download MP3s of some of my songs for free, or purchase my CDs. As I write this, the site is in the process of being updated to include a new listing, the long-awaited collector's edition of my soundtrack for Kenneth Anger's film LUCIFER RISING - a two-CD set. There's also a poster (available on the site) commemorating the new release. It features a picture of me that dates back to the 70s when I recorded the music, when I didn't look nearly as good as I do now. (smile)

Bobby

I was pleased to find out during a recent trip to Ameoba Records, that the Lucifer Rising soundtrack was released with additional music.  I have only been able to listen to this inspiring music from my copy of a copy of the movie.  I heard so much more with this release, the sound (and music) is incredible.  Magikal Powerhouse of OZ is amazing as well.  I also thought the Orkustra was deep and moving but there were only brief excerpts from Punjab's Barber and Flash Gordon.  I wanted to know if all available Orkustra music will be released and/or the full length versions of these songs?  You continue to inspire people, with this release widely available hopefully more and more will hear this timeless music.

Ryan

Hi Ryan,

Many thanks for writing to let me know that you are enjoying the new Lucifer Rising release. The early reviews are just starting to come in, and so far it's all raves. I can't even begin to tell you how gratifying this is.

A small outfit in Switzerland is currently putting together a very limited pressing (500 copies) of the surviving recordings by The Orkustra on vinyl LP. I agreed to give these guys first shot when I granted the license. Shortly afterward we will be putting out our own version of an Orkustra album on CD. This will happen sometime next year. It will include a relatively long story I wrote about how The Orkustra was concieved and brought together, and how it was integrated with the counter culture scene in San Francisco. Sadly, I have so far been able to come up with very few photos of the group, but I've got feelers out.

You may be interested in knowing that I have more music out on CD - four other titles. These are available exclusively at White Dog Music, although Arcanum Entertainment (who put out the double CD of the Lucifer Rising soundtrack project) has indicated an interest in picking them up for worldwide distribution. All of the titles are more recent, having been recorded over the past ten years, all in what some would classify as a progressive symphonic rock style (or what I call soundtracks for flights of the imagination).

Thanks again for the feedback.

Bobby

Dear Bobby,
First of all I would like to say what a change! Since your manson days you have done so much to give back to your community. It's amazing. I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions because I'm currently working on an essay for my writing class. If you dont want to answer that's okay but if you do that would be great.
Thank you so much for reading this email. I hope you will answer.
Yours Truly,
Courtney

Dear Courtney,

Thank you for getting in touch.

Years ago, when Barbara and I first decided to put up a website, our decision was predicated, at least in part, upon my willingness to be an open book to those who visit it. So, yes, I am willing to answer your questions (if you promise not to send me so many at once that I am overwhelmed by the task). Ask away. I will answer as best I am able. But please confine your questions to topics that I have not already thoroughly covered in the interviews, etc., on the site.

Very best,
Bobby

Hi Bobby,
I can see from your website that you have left the events of those years far behind you, but I am wondering if you would have a moment to give some insights into how you have led your life since then - and your life now.

I see you have married and are continuing to make music, and are also involved in youth projects. So I am really asking what your hopes are for the future, for your release and what else you would like to achieve.

Many thanks,
Tanith

Naturally, I have an intense desire to join my partner of twenty-five years at our home, to pick up the pieces of my life and explore some of the social and creative opportunities that I have dreamed about for so long. To have something much closer to a normal life, in other words. But I have long ceased doing battle with the vagaries and inconsistencies of a parole system that seems to operate without a clearly defined mission. It is just as painful to try to live in the future as it is to live in the past. So, as much as possible, I keep my focus on what I can do in the present to give meaning and purpose to my life, and to contribute in what ways I can to the lives of others.

When I am released from prison - and I do believe this will happen at some point - I intend to occupy my energies with more or less a continuation of the kinds of work I have been doing in past years while inside, but with fewer restrictions. Menial prison jobs not included, of course. And writing - I have done quite a lot of writing these many years, because it has sometimes been nearly the only form of self-expression available to me. That's one thing I plan to do less of after I'm out of here, at least until I've reached my dotage and it's time to write my memoirs.

Being an artist by nature, both musician and visual artist, I am drawn to looking for ways I can combine these two modes of expression. The skills I have developed as a videographer, providing videos in support of self-motivation and educational training for inmates, will come in handy when pursuing my ongoing interest in independent film. Composing and producing music for film continues to be a passion of mine, and I would love to create some music for Barbara's dance troupe. I frequently receive offers from other musicians who would like me to join with them in musical collaborations. Several manufacturers of music-related equipment and software have offered me opportunities to assist in design and development of musical instruments and tools. These are all in line with much of the work and self-study I have been involved in over the past several decades, and I will undoubtedly find ways to fit some of this in.

Another area of endeavor that beckons to me is continuing work with young people at risk of gang involvement. I see far too many young men - some of them barely out of their teens - coming in here with heavy crimes. It's overwhelming sometimes, like seeing my own multiple reflection in the fragments of a shattered mirror. Many of them come to prison having committed the extreme right of passage for too many young people in western society, that of killing another person for the dubious benefit of proving themselves as men to gain acceptance and a sense of identity in a gang. This is a tragedy of awesome proportions and far-reaching ramifications.

A youth outreach organization on the outside has invited me to go on a speaking tour to schools and youth facilities, assuming the conditions of my parole will permit this. If sharing my experiences with young people will help some of them to avoid turning their lives upside-down the way I did, I will consider it a privilege. Involving myself in this kind of enterprise can only be worthwhile.

But you want to know what I'm going to do first? I'm going to find a nice big tree to sit under, and I'm going to breathe deeply, taking in the world around me - the world I have missed so much.

Bobby

Dear Mr. Beausoleil,

I got a link to your website after looking at charliemanson.com.  His website has a lot of hatred.  Yours was like a breath of fresh air after looking over the other one. 

I guess I should tell you that I read Helter Skelter a long time ago and the whole story has always grabbed my attention.  I am not an obsessed follower or anything. 

I feel truly sorry for what you and the others have had to go through.

I listened to your music.....and as a musician myself, I thought it was excellent.

I just have a few questions.

Are you native american at all?  Some of the stuff seemed like it had native american tones.

Was Pink Floyd one of your favorite bands?  I hope you don't think it insulting in anyway, but the one piece of music I downloaded sounded like some Pink Floyd I have.

I think I will purchase some of your music because you are truly talented and I wish you could be out so you could do even more with it.

I hope to hear back from you.

My name is Heather and it was a pleasure speaking with you.

Thank you,

Heather 

Hi Heather,

Thank you for writing. I have never seen the charliemanson.com site, but many of my friends have. I doubt that Charlie has any connection to it. From what I hear it is just more exploitation of the tragedies - little wonder that you experienced it as being mean spirited.

I am a native of America, but I'm not Native American in the way you mean, just a crazy white boy of French descent. However, I have an appreciation of the earth-based spirituality of the Native American culture, and it was my intention to honor that in the piece I recorded called "Medicine Man". An Indian friend of mine, Jeffrey Cree, sang the vocal parts on that recording.

As it happens, Pink Floyd is one of my favorite bands. They explore sonic textures the way I like to do, so there was a natural attraction from the beginning. I don't consider them an influence so much as kindred spirits - after all, we are contemporaries, so it's more a case of us going in parallel directions, musically. But if you like Pink Floyd, you're probably going to like my stuff too. I hope you will pick up some of my recordings. The most popular release right now is the new double CD package of my soundtrack for Lucifer Rising. My perosonal favorite is Orb, which is much more recent.

Bobby

I want to see your and Barbara's art work, as I paint and all.

Please write back.

Tanya

Hi Tanya,

Barbara and I both thank you for your interest in seeing more of our work. The beausoleil.net site will be updated over the next month or two. When that happens, a BeauSoleil Gallery feature will be added. We'll be featuring a variety of work. Both of us have been painting our tails off, and we'll be showing lots of new pieces in the Gallery, and some older ones as well. Just check in on the site from time to time, as it's not very likely that we'll remember to send you a notice when the updated site goes up.

Bobby and Barbara

Dear Bobby,

I am Program Director for a non-profit organization in Little Rock, AR called Sophia's Center.  We work with incarcerated women both during and after their incarceration, teaching classes in the County Jail and then providing a Mentor Program for them upon release which partners them with a volunteer mentor from the community for one year.

I am very interested in finding the Breaking Barriers video series, but I am having no luck.  Can you steer me in the right direction on this?  It would be more than greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,

Beth

Dear Beth,

Thank you for writing.

I am no longer with Los Hermanos. I left the organization a few years ago so that I could devote more time to doing work that would be of benefit to a greater number of people in more diverse ways. The other members of the organization had the situation well in hand at that point, and we are all still friendly and supportive of one another's efforts.

I am passing your address along to the organization, and I have been assured that they will get in touch with you. My understanding is that they are out of copies of video series - and frankly, it has gotten to be a bit dated. However, they do have work books available, and I believe these would be of the greatest value in the context of your program - which, by the way, sounds well designed. The Los Hermanos program has been somewhat hampered by our own incarceration. Combining classes during incarceration with post-incarceration mentoring would seem a more comprehensive and effective approach, at least for some.

Best of luck in your endeavors. You are doing important work.

Sincerely,
Bobby BeauSoleil

PS - You may also contact Los Hermanos yourself at the following address:

Los Hermanos Youth Outreach
OSP Activities
2605 State St.
Salem OR 97310

Hi,

just wondering that such a crazy asshole as you are is having an internet-site together with his wife. Nice times in which we are living where mass-murder followers have an Internet-site telling people they make music and how they have changed. Be sure, is there is a real God there is also Hell and your victims that you have killed will all wait for you there. Your wife must be an absolut pervert to go to bed with such a monster as you are. Unfortunately our world is full of crazy people as you and your wife and I am so sorry for it. Hope you will NEVER rest in piece ! You always will be the monster of Manson, don´t forget that...

Greetings

Alain

7.2.04

Alain,

I can feel the pain behind your words. They remind me of a time when the violence of my own poisonous thoughts, and the belief that they were somehow more righteous than the thoughts of other people, made it possible for me to arrive at a judgement that my own self-interests were of greater value than the life of another human being. No one has the inherent right to make such judgements. I speak from personal experience when I tell you, Alain, that your venemous words are not far removed from murder, at least in spirit. Be careful they don't lead you down the same road I've had to travel.

I have opened myself up to whatever you may want to say about me. You may even direct insults at Barbara, though she has not harmed anyone, and is truly beyond your reproach. But the truth is that your judgements speak volumes more about you than they do of either of us, and they are far more hurtful to you than to us.

The beauty of the internet is that everyone may have a voice. Instead of complaining about the site Barbara has created for us, why not put up a site of your own so that other people can get to know you and your opinions?

Peace,
Bobby
(AKA crazy asshole)

Hello,

I appreciate your honest answer to my (in your opinion ) insults. The difference between you and me is that I may think bad about the Manson-followers but I would NEVER kill anyone...there is a big difference between thinking and really doing it. I only am for the death penalty in the case of mass-murderers and child-abusers.. people killing people for fun or a so-called Guru like Manson are not worth to live because they are totally crazy and harm people for nothing and destroy the life of their relatives. For me the Tate-murders are the most horrible things that happened after world-war II - Susan Atkins, Pat and the others should have been killed right away because they are the incarnation of evil. They all now talk about God but it´s to easy to turn now to God because you want forgiveness-don´t you think ? There are things to be forgiven and others who can never be forgiven !

Best regards

Alain

Hello Alain,

Thank you for replying. And thank you as well for tempering the tone of anger you feel about the despicable acts some people commit.

Again, I must say that there is less difference between you and me than you think. I too believed that I would NEVER kill a person . . . until it happened. Maybe it happened because I believed so strongly that such things only happened with other people, so that when I found myself in a really bad situation, I didn't know what to do because I had never given myself the chance to think things through, or know how to deal with the feelings I was having because I had never let myself feel them before.

About forgiveness. Withholding forgiveness is like a kind of emotional self-mutilation, and deeply painful to the person who withholds it. Forgiving a person for something they've done does not mean you condone what they did, or excuse them from the consequences of what they have done. It's more like a way of giving yourself permission to move beyond the pain.

But like you say, falling back on religion can be a cop-out.

Very best to you,
Bobby

Do you think Charlie should've died for what he did to everybody? 

Thomas

Thomas,

It is not my place or my responsibility or my desire to judge who should live or die. I tried that once and look where it got me.

Bobby

i just have one really big question and you may have already answered it but i didnt find the answers....how did you stop thinking the way that manson thought?

C.D.
 

C.D.,

Your question is indeed a big one, and it begs an answer.

The short answer is that I didn't really think in the way Charlie thought. But leaving it at that would not be entirely honest of me, as there were some views and notions we held in common. To the extent that all those of us who were directly involved in the counter-culture movement (not just those in Manson's circle) shared similar views about the issues of our day - the inequities in established society, the war in Vietnam, old versus new valules and morality, religion, music, sex, and so on - we were often in agreement. However, there were a number of topics we did not agree on at all. For example, he could not abide my appreciation of the music of Jimi Hendrix and the old blues greats, many of whom were black - this caused an almost violent reaction in him at times (he didn't want his people exposed to that). In short, I did not share his views on race, nor did I agree with his belief that women were meant to be in a subservient role to men. I'm attracted to women who are self-motivated and who can hold their own in an intelligent conversation. Obviously, this was a sticking point for Charlie. And there were many other disagreements between us that contributed to my being only an occasional visitor, not a resident of his commune.

I was a young man at the time, and looking for role models, and I can not deny that Manson was some influence in my life. If what you are asking is what the turning point was for changing the way I thought then to the much wiser orientation I have now, there wasn't any one point at which this occurred. It has been more like a series of turning points, a gradual process of maturation through much introspection and soul-searching, discarding one by one those beliefs and emotional influences that revealed themselves as invalid or no longer representative of who I choose to be.

Bobby

Dear Mr. Beausoleil- I am writing you today, just a little curious. I have been reading Helter Skelter and I was trying to figure out how you seemingly smart, young, slightly rebelious people could get mixed up with someone as strange as Mr. Charles Manson. As I read through the pages, I often think "what if that happened to me?". In this day and age, almost anything goes. As I am approaching the average age of the young women of the Family, I would just like to know how? How did he talk? How did you live? Why so much "love"? If you could send me an email helping me answer some of these questions, I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you.

Sincerely

Jordan

Think your wrong ........ I am reading a book called The Family and it's sad what happened. All the people who were invloved got screwed over. Do you ever regret meeting Manson to begin with?

Was he as sick and crazy as it was always written about him? 
It's got to be true......
Thomas
 
 

Tom and Jordan,

These questions are too broad to answer in the space of a single email reply. The best that I can do for now, until I have published the book I'm working on, is to hint at the answers. They are important questions, which doubtless accounts for why they are the types of questions I am asked most often. But the questions themselves. . . they are more telling than the answers, because they indicate in a very striking way that the characterizations in the popular media - books like Helter Skelter and The Family, the made-for-TV movies, even videotaped interviews with Manson himself - are something less than entirely satisfying to a great many people. I have come to believe that everyone who encounters this story knows on some instinctive level that much of what they are being told (mostly by people who were not actually a part of it) does not ring true.

Stripping away the falsities from the Manson mythology is an appealing prospect, but an incredibly daunting task. There are so many misconceptions and downright fabrications. Charlie has contributed to the confusion most of all because he has chosen, for the most part, to play-act the role the popular media has cast him into.

I can assure you of one thing for certain: the Charlie you have thusfar seen characterized in books, films and news media interviews bears little resemblance to the Charlie I knew. You ask, like so many do, if he really behaved that way, all crazy and weird. If he had, I would never have had anything to do with him, nor would anyone I knew.

One day the superficial falseness surrounding this story will fall away, revealing it to be far less terrifying and far more tragic than anyone but those who were directly a part of it could possibly imagine.

Bobby

Dear Bobby, I trust you are in receipt of my brief note. My name is Neil and I have read about you in books as well in different internet sites. Though your past deeds were wrong, as you would admit, I think it is honorable and quite decent that you have changed your life around, helping kids and striving to be a mentor and role model.  If you have the time I would really enjoy receiving a quick e-mail back but if lack of time doesn't permit you then it would be enough to know at least you were able to read my honest sentiments. With full respect.

Neil

Dear Neil,

Thank you for taking the time to write to me, and for the sentiments you have expressed. It is gratifying and encouraging to know that others, such as yourself, have recognized value in my life, where once I had been sentenced to death.
Thank you,
Bobby

Hey Bobby-

    I'm in the process of learning about what's happening with your latest musical endeavors and anything else. I'm familiar with your involvement with Arthur Lee and Love but that's about it. I was glad to hear you're still musically involved and working on stuff.

That seems to be an understatement, I didn't know you were a damn inventor! Anyways, you have a fascinating story that I had just skimmed the surface on before. Even with the Manson-related stuff, I enjoyed hearing your side of the story and not in a tabloidy sort of presentation. Let me just say that I can't believe you're still incarcerated, although as far as I can tell it's because of the notoriousness of the case.

    I'll talk about some shit I'm more familiar with now. I've been an avid Love fan for a while, so let me babble on about them for a while. Michael Stuart recently came out with a book that covers I think mainly the mid-60's period of the band. Now Arthur is writing something called "The Book of Love" (but of course!) that I just now heard about. Any plans for a book? Do it just on that one band, you can pass over all the other stuff. It'll be great! Oh yeah, I think Don Conka is still alive and well, Arthur even had him in the last lineup around ten years ago. You probably heard about that Bryan's since left us- sad to hear that Ken Forssi also recently passed (cancer I think). Johnny Echols actually played at two of Arthur's last LA shows. It seems that Arthur is pretty level-headed and is abstaining from the drugs and drink. Not to be nosy but have you been clean all this time? There's been so many casualties of excess, but I guess it goes with the territory. I'm an addict myself (clean and sober for seven months) so I can't help but be curious.

    Are you still in Oregon? I'm down here a little north of San Luis Obispo- good old central coast right? Well, it's a nice climate. Rather be in San Francisco, although that's where I got in trouble with the substances. Well, maybe I'll hearfrom ya soon. Take care and I hope you'll breathe some free air soon.  

Tim

Hi Tim,

Thank you for the update on Arthur and the various members of Love. I was especially pleased to hear that Johnny has been performing with Arthur recently. It was seeing the two of them perform together (more than an interest focused on Arthur), attractively contrasted with Don and Bill, that first moved me to approach Arthur for a spot in the band. I had heard about Bryan's passing, but not Ken's (who I did not know). I was surprised to hear Arthur described as "pretty level-headed." What I've heard is that he is as irascible as ever. This is consistent with an interview he did when on tour in Europe, in which he made some unflattering remarks about me. I think he would like to distance himself from any association with me - presumably because of the Manson connection, and in light of Manson's reputed racial-centric stance it is understandable.

I had heard about Michael Stuart's book, and I plan to pick up a copy at some point. A book of my own is in the works, but it is not about my brief stint with The Grassroots-cum-Love. If I were to write only about that it would be a very short book indeed! Although I resented Bryan at the time for the underhanded way he and his friends lobbied to replace me in the band during my brief absence, I would later become grateful to him for that. Otherwise I might not have moved to San Francisco and formed my own band (and others subsequent) that enjoyed notoriety far from Arthur's shadow. If you would like to know more about these musical exploits, you should check out White Dog Music. The ongoing story is richer than you know.

As for my drug use history, I never progressed beyond pot and some psychedelics. I saw what heroin, crank, barbiturates and alcohol had done to a lot of my friends, and chose to steer clear of the heavy stuff. Smoking pot would severly interfere with my parole, so, though I admit a weakness for it, I have to steer clear of that too. I hope Arthur stays clean and free. And you too.

Thanks again for writing.
Bobby

DEAR BOBBY...

HOW DID U MEET BARBARA AND WHEN?

~KC

KC,

Barbara tells this story better than me.

We met in mid-1981 at the prison in Tracy where I recorded the film soundtrack. I had recently completed the project, and a Sacramento news journalist did a short feature segment about me, with much of the focus on how I had been designing and building musical instruments while in prison. Barbara saw the program, and decided to write me a letter. She said that she was impressed by my having found ways to be creative in such adversity, and wanted to offer a few words of encouragement. She said she also liked the way I moved . . . Well, I invited her to visit me in Tracy, and she did. That was the start of the next big thing in my life - the biggest ever.

Bobby

Dear Mr Beausoleil,

I have just listen to the free tunes on the White Dog website and i found them wonderful. Running with White Wolf brought me tears in my eyes. My name is Martin i am 35. I live near Montreal, Canada. I am living tough time these days but your music really made me feel good tonight.

Thank you for sharing your talent

Martin

Dear Martin,

Finding that some of my music has touched the heart of another soul is the best kind of compliment. I am grateful, and very pleased to know that my music lifted your spirits.

There is a little story behind the song you mentioned, Running with the White Wolf. From childhood until I was arrested as a young man, I had a series of white dogs - Frosty, Snofox, and Hocus - who were my close friends and companions. Later, Barbara got another white dog for me (though I was in prison) and he became a beloved member of the family. His name was "Z" - and they don't come any better. His pictures are on the White Dog site, both as a puppy and as an adult. When he died, everyone was very sad. I wrote the song to honor Z and all the white dogs I had known in my life, who had taught me much of love and nobility. Another name for it might be "Dog Heaven." I had tears in my eyes when I composed it.

Bobby

Bobby,

I don't practice felony criminal defense law but my feeling is that the public is going to oppose paroles in any of the related Manson cases until Manson is dead.  From everything I've read, the others convicted with him have gone to great lengths to disassociate themselves with him and show that they've reformed. A number of years ago I corresponded with Leslie Van Houten and got some very thoughtful letters from her.   But the notoriety of any association with Manson makes me wonder about the fairness of punishing the "followers" as severely as the ringleader who, presumably, was the most culpable.  After all, Albert Speer was convicted of crimes against humanity at Nuremberg but served only 20 or 25 yrs.  Then again, Rudolf Hess, convicted at the same trial, remained in prison his entire life.  I read later that the French, Americans, British and Russians all had to agree to release any of the German war criminals and the Russians refused to ever let Hess out because he had been captured in England in a hairbrained attempt to convince the British to turn on the Russians and join the Germans in a war against Russia. 

Alan

Alan,

I have heard this before, the notion that Manson may have to die before I will be allowed parole. You may be right, but I will not look for my freedom (no matter how intensely I may desire it) at the price of another man's life. Isn't that how I got into this fix in the first place?

A lot of people assume that I am bitter towards Charlie. They naturally believe, given all that has happened, that I would harbor a fierce resentment towards him and think him despicable for all the devastation he has wrought in my life and in the lives of others who loved and trusted him. And I admit, there have been times when I felt and thought that way. But not since I realized that I was only hurting myself more by doing so. Besides, if he proved to be unworthy of the trust invested in him, whose fault was that? Charlie may have been older than me by fourteen or fifteen years, but he wasn't any smarter or wiser, evidently, or practiced at being responsible for the well-being of others. At the end of the day, I must own the consequences of the choices I made. I can hardly hold him to blame for being subject to the same paranoid delusions that so many others of us suffered under during those incredibly intense times. In the end, I can only wish him well and move on with my own life in the best way that I can.

Regarding your comments about the fairness, or lack of it, in holding all of the former associates of Manson to the same level of accountability as him, I must say, Alan, it's worse than you think! Only a lawyer such as yourself who still believes in the ideals of the legal profession, or someone who has never run afoul of the American justice system, would characterize the situation in such terms. By and large, the justice system in this country ceased to be guided by a fundamental sense of fairness quite some time ago. It is driven now by economics and politics underlaid by a fear-based dynamic that is pervasive, and which is grossly amplified and exploited by media "journalists." Western society is like a deer caught in the headlights, paralyzed by uncertainly, unsure of which direction to leap. And I, like all the other blindlings, must await the one-eyed man who may show us the way out of this mess.

Bobby

hope this finds you well,i wish you well in your efforts to win release from prison. i think you are an excellent musician and have done well in turnung your life around.

Thank you for writing. I am hearing this sort of thing quite a lot lately. A good sign, it seems to me.

Bobby

How was Leslie Van Houten? Did you love her ?

I play guitar also.

My best,

Michael

Mr. Beausoleil,

I am a writer living in Texas and ran across your website while researching the life of Leslie Van Houten.  I learned today that she was again denied parole.  I'm glad you have become a positive contributor to life in America, even if it is within the walls that surround you.  Be well and pray fervently.  God has everything under control.

 Gary

Leslie, as I remember her, was a sweetheart - about as inoffensive a human being as you could ever want to meet. . . pretty, fun loving, with a broad smile and a ready sense of humor. It saddens me to hear that she was denied parole yet again. What I know about her crime isn't much, just what I've heard or read, but it is my understanding that she did not actually kill anyone. If what we have been told is true, she was pressured into stabbing one of the victims - a person who was already dead - to make her complicite in the murder as a form of insurance, to prevent her from spilling what she knew to the authorities. The strategy worked - and this is, perhaps, her real crime in the eyes of some, that she did not become a witness for the state. For this she has been in prison for nearly 35 years. It stopped being about justice a long time ago.

Bobby

 
Mr. Beausoleil 
Why can't you just come out and admit that all you people were just crazy to follow him and that's he's a luney tune? Your in your predicament because you guys thought he was Jesus Christ.You really think that Krenwinkle,Van Houten, Atkins,Squeaky Fromme were normal rational people? It was right to kill the Tate's- LaBianca's? Tex Watson's a sane person? Oh give me a break!!!! And don't insult America's intelligence. Do us a favor. Believe me: Sharon Tate, Sebring, Frykowski, Parent didn't deserve to die that way. The''Family'' fell apart and it drove Charlie CRAZY. He'll never
get out. It'll soon be 36 years since those murders took
place. And you guys are paying for it. I read in my book that Charlie didn't have a prayer. And he's an old man today. Tell me something
do you have any contact with anyone from the Family? 
 
Van Houten, Atkins, Krenwinkle all are looking old. Squeaky, too. And she's in prison for life for trying to kill Ford. And her pistol wasn't set right. I am enjoying the book, and it dosen't show a different side of Charlie boy. It showed him as he was. A crazy psyco killer who got what he deserved. By right he should've died for what he did, instead he's a famous killer who'll go down in history as a dangerous person. 
 The only reason this story got press like it did was that it had Hollywood written all over it. So........ Helter
Skelter to you all. As the D.A. Bugliosi said, all that
Charlie committed was murder. Think about it Mr. Beausoleil 
 
Thomas
 
 
Thomas,



Believe me, I have thought about it - a lot more than you can even begin to imagine.



Your mind is all made up, stuck on what you've been told by the exploitative press. There's nothing here to answer. Ask me a question with a genuine interest in learning something and I will do my best to answer it.



Bobby
 
 
 
Tell me the truth what drew you to him and the family to begin with?? 
 
Thomas
 

Thomas,

That's better.

What attracted me to Charlie was his unique talent as a musician, and his gregarious happy-go-lucky nature. This, I realize, is in stark contrast to the Manson you and the world at large have come to know and hate as "crazy psycho killer" - a role largely defined for him by a malicious, blood-thirsty media, and which he has chosen to adopt (perhaps in the hope that if people fear him enough they might leave him alone in his own more agreeable company). Understand that in saying this I do not defend him or condone any acts he may have committed, or suggest that he be held any less accountable for them. I mean only to recommend that you take what you have seen, heard or read about him with a generous pinch of salt. Manson has collaborated with the popular media to manufacture an hysterical construct of evil personified in the form of a human icon. By collective concensus he is playing the role of society's whipping boy. And really, it's all something like a big puppet show.

As for the other part of your question, I was not really attracted to the commune you refer to as "the family." I was never a member in the sense you seem to imply. I hardly knew most of the people in that group. For me, they were part of the context in which I knew Charlie. Those I knew seemed nice enough people, but I was not interested in joining any clubs.

Bobby

So Here's another question. If you are soooo convinced,
Mr. Beausoleil, that we on the outside are misinformed about Charlie
Manson and everything else associated with him. Then let me ask you
the $100,000 question. Since, in your twisted mind, that 
the media are so misinformed, was it exageratted in the way you and
Susan Atkins killed Gary Hinman???? Or was that all made
up? Can you honestly answer that question with a clear conscience? 
 There's a reason your in prison for the rest of your life. 
 Yeah I guess that Manson's evilness is just a figment of our
imaginations. Mr. Beausoleil take your head out of your ass 
and wake up and smell the coffee, would you. You
people should've been gassed in the chamber when they had the chance. 
  Killing a group of innocent
people. How dare you people. How would you have
liked it if Manson killed someone you loved or cared about?? Like
someone in your family, like your Mom or Dad,siblings? 
Think about that while you sit in your jail cell. 
 Can you sleep at night,or do you get
nightmares? Just remember this......if
Charlie or any one of you people ever were to be released, there will be
someone out there ready to blow your heads off. And
that ain't no bullshit. Or are we all wrong in thinking
that? You people should be sharing a cell with
O.J. Simpson.  You probably think he's innocent,too. 
Thomas
 
 

Thomas,

I have been patient and forthcoming in all of my answers to you, even though it was apparent that your "questions" were only thinly disguised excuses to make attacks on people you believe yourself to be superior to. I feel no obligation to answer any more of them, so consider these my final words to you.

I have withheld nothing about the circumstances that led to the commission of my offense, nor about the process and the results of my coming to terms with my actions. There are no unanswered questions in these areas. I have opened myself up and made all of this information available to anyone who may be interested.

Let me pose a couple of questions that you might want to ask of yourself. The thoughts you've expressed indicate that your vindictive anger is justified and motivated by sympathy for those you refer to as "innocent people". Do you honor them, over 35 years later, with personal attacks, abusive language, and threats? If you set yourself on high and make hate-filled judgements of others with murder in your heart, how are you any better than those you despise and think so far beneath you?

Take it from one who has learned the hard way: If what you truly want is for the world to be a safer and saner, place, with less violence and suffering, the place to start is within yourself.

Go in peace.

Bobby

I was just watching a program about the manson family, there was a brief mention of you on it and I thought I'd check you out. Looks like you're doing pretty good (considering your surroundings). You only have the one charge against you don't you? I'll never be able to figure out why some people get stuck in prison for eternity regardless of their obvious rehabilitation (such as yourself) while others kill, rape, etc. show no remorse, maybe do a little time then are turned loose to repeat. Unless I'm missing something, I think you've been in long enough! are you eligible for parole? If so I hope you get it. I'm going to check out your music site and possibly make a purchase if I like it.
do you get to use a computer in there or does someone relay all e-mails to you?
Well I've talked long enough, hang in there!
Kevin

Yeah, Kevin, we're all mystified by the way the American justice system works today. A great many people, Europeans especially, are appalled by the nonsensical way in which it operates. It is driven to a very large extent by pure vindictiveness, and in the long run, of course, this only exacerbates the problem of crime in this country, effectively dividing it against itself. However, there are some indications of change in the wings, and I remain hopeful.

I do have only the one charge (bad enough), and I have been eligible for parole since 1976. Sometimes it seems like it's been an eternity, but I don't waste energy feeling sorry for myself. All I can do - all anyone can do - is make the most of the life one has. And indeed, in some ways I am a very rich man.

I hope you found some music on the White Dog site that you like.

Although I have been allowed the use of a computer in my job assignment, I am not permitted to use it for personal purposes. Email is a great way to communicate (few people bother to write letters these days). I am very fortunate to have Barbara's help in relaying them.

Bobby

Hello----

I'd never heard any of your music before, but I recently found a copy of your 2-disc Lucifer Rising soundtrack release and loved it! Keep in mind I've never even seen the movie itself. The second disc of rare recordings with your previous band was especially fascinating.......it's timeless and can't be labeled in any way.

Just wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed your tunes. Compliments on you and you wife's website, which is well-designed and interesting.

Take care,

Keith

Hi Keith,

Thank you for the feedback on the new re-issue of the soundtrack. I am very pleased to know you are enjoying it. A lot of people seem to like it - sort of a delayed reaction, 25 years after the fact. I'm having a lot of fun with it.

Best regards,
Bobby

Bobby,

    Thank you for your comments and insights.  The view of our legal system from where you sit and after what you've experienced is understandably different than that of anyone who has never been a defendant in the system. 

I agree that for the most part the American criminal justice system has long ago thrown out the idea of rehabilitation and has instead settled for just flat out punishment.  The general public just wants to put the "criminal element" as far away and it can and for as long as it can.  And certainly there are those recidivist types who are probably never going to reform and need to be out of circulation and there are others who are so dangerous that they cannot be allowed to be free again.  There are then some whose case gets caught up in such a degree of notoriety, fanned to a bonfire by the media, that they become so affixed in the public mind that the punishment of those in particular becomes symbolic.  I.e., California can parole convicted murderers every year but those from the Manson case (with the exception of Manson who can never be allowed to be free, I think everyone is of one mind about that) are kept in custody because everyone remembers that case and the press blow on the coals to keep it going whenever any of the participants come up for parole hearings.  The emphasis on straight out, long-term punishment has gotten to the point that the US probably has a larger % of its population in prison than any other Western country.  And while I feel that the death penalty is justified in many cases, the fact that the US is the only Western country that employs the death penalty is troubling to me.  But the fact is, there are certainly many men and women in the prison system who are genuinely rehabilitated and could be productive citizens if freed.  But with mandatory sentences and politically compromised parole boards, what chance will they have?  The irony is that I would suspect that some of the most trustworthy of inmates are probably those who have been convicted of murder---for many of them their crime was an impulsive or reckless or immature or drug/alcohol impaired act which is almost certainly not going to be repeated.  But they will sit in custody while predatory sex offenders are released back into the community, because those men have shorter sentences even though they're almost guaranteed to eventually reoffend. 

My own community was rocked just last weekend by a senseless murder in a neighboring small town.  A very popular teacher and athletic coach was stabbed to death late at night at his high school when he stopped by to drop off some video tapes of that night's football game. Two teenagers from a neighboring city were there as part of a Mexican gang initiation and they must've been burglarizing the school when the teacher found them.  The younger one, only 14, stabbed the coach and killed him apparently instantly.  It took about 2 days for the sheriff's office to figure out the case and the 14 yr old and his 16 yr old accomplice were arrested and apparently immediately confessed.  The 16 yr old is currently charged with 1st Deg. Murder and will automatically stand trial as an adult and probably will get 20+ as a minimum if convicted; the younger kid is charged with aggravated murder which carries life without parole if convicted as an adult.  Of course the state will be seeking to try him as an adult.  It will be utterly impossible for either kid to get a fair trial in our area because of the notoriety of the crime and they've only been in custody a couple of days.  While in particular the court system is supposed to have certain safeguards for crimes committed by juveniles (in the case of the 14 yr old, if he was kept in the juvenile system, he could only be held until he's 21) it is easy to predict that this kid will be moved into the adult system.  That's almost preordained---the community will see him as a typical young Mexican gangbanger who, for no reason, killed one of the most respected men of his community (a white victim, to make the contrast even starker).  Even if the venue is changed, the judges hearing the case will no doubt recognize the ire of the community which has no interest in trying to rehabilitate either of these teenagers. 

In any event, certainly I'm not telling you anything that you don't already know or haven't heard before.  It is a harsh enough system for those who are actually guilty of the crimes they're in prison for, I cannot imagine how those who are genuinely innocent cope while incarcerated.  In either case, I think that the person has to find dignity and grace within himself and draw strength from God.

Best regards,

 Alan

Alan,

Your thought-provoking analysis of the US criminal justice system underscores what I believe is at the root of what ails it: the misguided belief that subjecting persons who commit criminal acts to vindictive methods of control and containment will somehow magically result in a reduction in crime, and thereby ease the pressure of fear in US society that underlies such beliefs.

We all want to be free from the fear, because fear makes us feel small and powerless - and that tends to make us angry. And so we devise ways of dealing with what frightens us that are founded on anger and vengeance. This approach to the problem of crime is self-defeating. It's like picking at a sore - the injury never heals. Instead, it worsens, becomes infected, and unless some other method of treating the injury is employed the infection will eventually consume the entire body.

Look at the buildup of US prisons and prison populations over the past 20 years, and measure this against the alleged "reduction" in crime. Then tally up the gross expenditure of resources this expedient has consumed. Do this and you are bound to realize that we've been trading schools and hospitals and more effective methods of treating the social disease of criminal behavior for prisons and a legacy of human suffering. And if we continue on this path much longer, that is all that will remain.

With regards,
Bobby

hello there.

 my name is katie, im a twenty years old & i live in washington state.

 this is an odd question, but,

if you were to vote in this upcoming election for presidency,

who would you vote for, and why?

Katie,
Any leader who believes that trumping up justifications to attack another sovereign country can be any part of a plan for peace, or, for that matter, who believes that aggression and violence should be anything but an absolute last resort, is no leader of mine.

Bobby

Dear Bobby, I hope you are doing well. I am pretty well. I was thinking about how you seemed to want me to believe and accept that you are right with God. It has to be enough for you to be sure of what you believe and why without any doubt, since your eternal life is the issue too. I know that as a christian I do believe that the only way to get to the Father is through Jesus, and there is no other way. I am well aware of how many bad things have been done in Jesus name, falsely, and by other religions too. But, when you really know Jesus  then there is a different perspective you begin to see than the one you have from your perspective., however logical and reasonable it may be. The only other thing I can say is God is love and He loves you very much, so I hope we both agree about that! It is going to get worse and the rest of the world is going to start to see the christian worldview as the problem and a time will come when christians will really be persecuted by the world for our peculiar viewpoints and some are right now One key thing about true christianity is of course truth, and love and mercy and NO Compromise!.

Love,

Tara

Dear Tara,

Truth, love and mercy . . . we can never have too much of that. But what does "NO Compromise" have to do with the teachings of Christ? Is this not at odds with truth, love and mercy?

To answer something you wrote earlier, no I would prefer not to agree to disagree. I have no disagreement with your system of beliefs. I accept, without condition or reservation, that your spiritual beliefs are your personal salvation and perfectly right for you. Where we get into some difficulty is your inability or unwillingness to extend the same acceptance to me. It's not your fault. You have adopted a system of religious belief that tends by its nature, to be holier-than-thou. It is a system of belief that makes it virtually impossible for you to accept that I could possibly know salvation unless I adopt the same system of belief. Consequently, maintaining something like a regular correspondence with you has become way too much like hard work.

And by the way, Tara, when I used the word "tiresome" I was talking about the behavior - the preaching, and defending your faith even when it is not under attack - and not you as a person. I simply weary of trying to explain that I am at peace and in harmony with the soul of all creation, and not in need of your particular flavor of salvation. Unless I couch this statement in Christian terminology you will continue to think, "Oh, the poor misguided soul," and make it your personal mission to bring the ignorant savage to Jesus. Well, I've got news for you. My spiritual beliefs do not require your endorsement. You speak of the nature of Christianity's purpose to be "swordlike." That is not how I experience it. To me it seems more like a bludgeon - something used to beat people about the head and shoulders. If, as you say, a time is coming when Christians are persecuted by "the rest of the world," it won't be because of the Christian world view, as you put it, but because of their incessant nagging!

Here's more news for you. Christ the Redeemer, in his Love, has redeemed the world - ALL of humanity - unconditionally. With his own blood he cleansed every human being of guilt, even if that human being has never heard the name Jesus and worships God in another of His/Her infinite guises. Not a single ritual, not a sequence of words, much less the adoption of a particular religion, is required to be worthy of that redemption. The church fathers don't want you to know this, of course, because that would probably put them out of business. Might not be such a bad thing.

God is love. Yes, this is what I believe (actually, when you strip away the dogma and give less weight to the types of symbolism we use, our core beliefs are not so different). God is love and love is all there is. Put this on one of those prayer wheels like the Tibetans do and spin it as fast as you can . . . God is love is all is god is love is all is god is love is. . .and that will do more good in the world than all the Holy Scripture - new testament, old testament, gnostic texts, or scriptures upon which any religion has been founded - combined.

God is love,

Bobby

 
 
 
Hey bobby, good for you getting your life on track i
am a 1st time visiter to your web, today. 9/16/4/ 
do you like tangerine dream? 

Cody

Hi Cody,
I haven't listened to enough Tangerine Dream to know how much I like their music, but I like what I've heard - mostly soundtracks for some movies I've seen. I plan to order a CD or two of theirs when I can afford to (no discounts in the prison CD catalogs).

Bobby

Dear Bobby,

Thank u for answering my letter. I'm just nosy.  :-) 

Do u think they will ever let u out?  Do u and Barbara get to

have 'bone yard' visits?

    ~KC

Dear KC,

My story will not be done until I am out - and even then there may yet be a chapter or two.

Family visits - or what you call "bone yard" visits - were taken from prisoners with life sentences about 11 years ago, in California. For 13 years prior to that Barbara and I had opportunities to enjoy some privacy together, and I can assure you we made the most of them.

You really are nosey!

Bobby

Dear Bobby,

My name is Nick and I live in Christchurch, New Zealand. I have recently finished my degree in film and television production and wanted to write to you to congratulate you on all the inspirational and meaningful work you have been doing, both in music and video. I have read your web page and think it is wonderful what you are doing with at risk kids and the work you are doing in making videos produced entirely by prisoners. There needs to be more people like you in the world, giving people a second chance and changing peoples perspectives. Congratulations also on the way you have turned your life around so dramatically, I know it must have taken a lot of courage and you should feel very proud. I have enormous respect for you Bobby, keep up the good work.

Yours Sincerely

Nick

Hi Nick,

Thanks for writing and sharing your thoughts. You've entered an exciting field. I discovered that I had a knack and a passion for all manner of media content creation, and I know that I'll be into it till I drop. Unfortunately, the media program at the prison was dismantled about a year ago. Some of the more forward-thinking people in the administration moved on - promoted or retired - and advocacy for this progressive program virtually disappeared. It may be reconstituted, and I will likely be a part of it if it is. But really, I've got my sights set on doing this work in my own studio on the streets, where there will be far fewer limitations and no fickle prison bureaucracy to deal with. Meanwhile, many of the videos I made or worked on are still being used quite extensively, so there's that. Lately I have been doing quite a lot of visual art the old fashioned way - by hand. Barbara and I are both artists, and a new "BeauSoleil Gallery" will be going up on the site in the near future, displaying both her work and mine.

Thanks again,
Bobby

 
 
Have you ever heard the Mahavishnu CD "Visions Of The
Emerald Beyond"?
Especially "Lila's Dance".
Al

Al,

This is the second time in a matter of days that someone has brought Mahavishnu to my attention. The first was in a review that llikened some of my earlier music with that of Mahavishnu Orchestra - quite flattering, as John McLaughlin is far more the master guitarist, and I have long appreciated his reverent, spiritual approach to playing music. Sadly, my exposure has been limited to rare radio play, for the most part. But I have made a note of the title you reference, and will purchase it, now that we are allowed to buy CDs and portable players. Thanks for bringing it to my attention.

Bobby

 
O.K. Here's another question for you...... What was Squeaky
really like as a person?  Was she as sick as the
''media'' made her out to be? Do you think that Mr.
Bugliosi did his job, in convicting Manson? Or do you think
that was another thing the ''media'' thought of? 
Have you had any contact with any ''family'' members? 
Thomas
 

Lynette Fromme, when I knew her during that brief period in my life, was a pretty, freckle-faced redhead with an expressive face and a sometimes piping voice - hence, her nickname. Squeaky was utterly devoted to Charlie, and I suspect she may be to this day. But I doubt that she could deliberately hurt another person. It was no accident that the gun she pointed at Gerald Ford was inoperable. He was no more in real danger than if she had pointed her finger at him. I believe she was just feeling left behind, like she had to do something so she would be put in prison like all the other people she cared about.

For the umpteenth time, no, I have no contact with so-called "members". Pay attention now: I have moved on with my life as of several decades ago.

Bobby

I enjoyed reading your interviews.  I was interested in your differentiation
between popular written history and what actually happened and your metaphor
on free commerce.

Greg

Dear Bobby,

 I have read the articles on how your life has progressed since 1969.  I was 14 during the time of the Manson killings and remember it well and I also know being an odd unwanted teenager growing up in the midwest how easy it is to become influenced by someone older and devious.  From reading about all the people who's lives were damaged and the victims destroyed by Manson's terrible influence, all of you, Atkins, Krenwinkel, Van Houten, and Watson had all led productive lives.  I am hopeful you will be released and be able to spend time with your family and daughter and live out the rest of your life.  I am a divorced dad, with a 13 year old daughter who is the light of my life.  I am retired Navy and work as a mail carrier and I do enjoy being a dad and having that family bond.  Someday, I might remarry again.  Take care Bobby and I will pray that someday soon you will released to your family.

Sincerely,  Damon

Dear Damon,

The human world becomes that much more healed and whole when any one of us expresses forgiveness and understanding to another. Thank you for writing.

I cherish that relationship you have with your daughter. It is a priceless thing. I keep my sights always on the prize of being united with my loved ones.

Bobby

Hi

i understand this mail may get to Bobby in time?

im Clive Jones from the UK band Black Widow, seems we have both appeared on the lords of Chaos cd

i wonder if you ever knew that the events that happened stopped us from going to the States B/sabbath always say it stopped them from going but this is not true it was Black Widow who were not allowed in all those years ago

i wonder if you ever heard our "Sacrifice" album it was withdrawn from sale when we were not going to the states

Any way i wish you well after all these years

Clive Jones

Hey fellow Lord of Chaos,

Thanks for writing. The emails do get to me in time - pretty quickly, usually, but I am sometimes too hammered by obligations and projects to answer right away. And it happens that there is quite a lot going on in my life these days.

The closest I've come to hearing the Sacrifice album is hearing your track on the L of C release. I had heard the story about the stalled tour, but like most people I heard it was Black Sabbath (who I never really cared for all that much). Thanks for setting the record straight. Look at it this way. If the tour had gone as originally planned your plane could have been lost in a storm and crashed into a mountain. Think of all the good things you may have missed if that one event had been altered. I have lost much to tragedy, but I count my blessings every day, and I'll bet there are a lot more of them than you would porbably suspect would be the case under the circumstances.

All the best to you, Clive.

Bobby

Hi Bobby,
My name is Haron, from Australia. I am a pretty avid collector of records from the 60's/70's and I try to get originals of them and not reissue on vinyl or cd. Having said that, I recently did a deal with a guy I know in Belgium for an orig Canadian copy of the soundtrack to Lucifer Rising. It is super rare of course and I would like to get the basic facts around it so please can you tell me: I am confused because it apperar the film was made in 1972 and the soundtrack was written in 1980. How is this possible? PLease can you throw some light on the release dates etc.. so it makes sense?
 
Also, I wonder how many were pressed and released of this on vinyl originally? How were they distributed?
 
Did you write the score in San Fran in Angers House or in Jail or where and why is it a Canadian pressing?
 
This should do for now if you care to reply.
 
Thank you
 
best regards
 
Haron
 

Hello Haron,

I will do my best to answer your questions.

Much of the film was shot in 1972, or thereabouts, but Lucifer Rising would not become a finished movie until after I completed the soundtrack in 1979, at which time some additional shots were added. The film was debuted in 1980.

The original recordings I had made for the film in the 60s were "lost" - or so I thought. All of the recordings that went into the final soundtrack were made at Tracy Prison, California. I began work on the project in 1976 and finished it, as I said, in 1979. I had always intended to put the soundtrack out as an album, and retained my copyright to the work, informally granting a license to Kenneth Anger, allowing him to use it for the film in perpetuity. I met a young woman from Canada by the name of Laurie Holland. She and a friend wanted to help me put the album together, and I agreed. The pressing was limited to 1000 copies, unnumbered. Most of them were given to members of the band, to family and friends, and the largest number of them were sold by Kenneth at showings of the film.

You really should pick up a copy of the recent Lucifer Rising OST double CD release. It is readily available from White Dog Music (including signed copies), and includes a booklet with many photos and the full story, as well as the "lost" recordings of the original 60s recordings, on the second disk. This way you can listen to the music without subjecting your rare LP to additional wear, and you won't have to flip the record over.

Bobby

Hello,

Awhile ago I had an acquaintance who had come across you artwork.  I had seen 2 works, Luna and Purgatory, and thought that they were beautiful.

I was wondering if you had any artwork for sale, as they have been haunting my mind ever since.

Regards,
Fran

Dear Fran,

I have just finished some new pieces in my continuing Dreamways of the Mystic series. Most of these are available for sale; email me if you are interested.

My first gallery show is scheduled to open March 1st and will run through April, 2005, at Clair Obscur Gallery in Hollywood, California. This event will be open to the public. The entire series will be on display, and many pieces will be available for sale.

In the near future, the BeauSoleil site will be updated to include a new BeauSoleil Gallery feature that will allow visitors to view both Barbara's paintings and mine, and to purchase originals as well as much less expensive art prints.

Thanks for your interest,
Bobby

Dear Bobby,

I recently came across your website with "White Dog Music" and had the privilege of being able to sample some of your work. I have to admit i really did enjoy listening to your songs. As a matter of fact, with Christmas coming, i'll have to place a few orders to send out as christmas gifts.  I really did enjoy listening to some of the samples and have already bookmarked your website on my favorites list.

It's a very sad thing to know that you've still been denied your freedom, especially after all this time. Leslie has also been denied her parole as recently as last august and it's a terrible thing. It seems so unfair that the institution can dangle the possibility of parole in front of you and then so cold heartedly take it away with denial after denial. I can't imagine anyone surviving in a place like that for all that time and still having something positive to build off of.  I give you a great deal of credit for that and, in spite of all, you've still managed to do something constructive with your life. It's a tribute to the real spirit within you.

I have a few cd's that were done on the Family Jams and, if i remember correctly, you had played a french horn at some of the recordings. That must have been a magical time in the beginning when the music was at the core of the Familys being. It was uplifting, spiritual and magical in its own way. Everyone there brought something unique to the group and it was reflected in the music. There was a true wealth of talent among you and others. I still cherish those recordings as they are unlike the "Hard Core" empty songs that we hear on the radio today. The songs that you and the other family members did were real, heartfelt and spiritually moving. I'm very glad to see that those unique qualities are reflected in your own recordings of today. You did a really nice job with them and they’re a tribute to your musical legacy.

I wish you well and hope that you're given a chance to be free once again. Everyone makes mistakes in their lives and we all pay for those mistakes in our own way. You and Leslie, in my opinion, should be granted parole. I hope that day comes soon.

God Bless and be well.......

 James 

Dear James,

Thank you so much for your kind remarks. I do what I can under the circumstances to contribute something meaningful to the world, but it is sometimes difficult to tell if there is any resonance in the greater landscape outside prison walls and my personal circle of family and friends. When an echo comes back, as in the case of your letter, I receive valuable confirmation that there is meaning and purpose in what I do, for others.

Actually, I have never played a french horn. That was Paul Watkins, who may have played a few droning notes on some of the recordings. I played guitar and bousouki with the group when I was in town, playing lead fills and counterpoint to Charlie's rhythms and lyrics, but as I have not heard those CDs you mention, I don't know if I appear on any of them. Steve Grogan played accompanying guitar on some of the recordings, I'm sure. He was just a beginner at that time, but he would become quite an accomplished musician in years to come, and his inherent talent would likely be apparent in the recordings.

The Family Jam was the name of the band that was formed around Charlie's songs and vocals. After the tragedies it was turned by the press into "the family," and became another context entirely. For a time the band included Dennis Wilson as drummer, and we played electric instruments, with Steve playing bass, and the others - mostly girls - singing background and occasionally playing soft accompaniment on other instruments. The music did at times, as you note, have a spiritually uplifting quality. That was the attraction for me. I wanted to get Charlie into the studio to make professional recordings of his music. I eventually succeeded, but the tapes of those recordings mysteriously disappeared.

I am, incidentally, writing a book entitled The Family Jam, about those experiences.

Bobby

 
I am an attorney here in [location withheld]. I'm sure like
many others, I found your website through an interest
in the Manson case. I was drawn to your website by a
macabre interest, but I read it with great fascination
and admiration. It is truly wonderful what you have
done with your life. At this time of Thanksgiving, I
wish you and yours the very best.
Ed 
 
 

Hello Ed,
Thank you for sharing your transformative experience when visiting the site. Wouldn't it be nice if the whole world could have a similar experience, and we could all raise ourselves one notch out of the plague of fear and loathing brought about in response to the Manson case. But that would be a bit too easy, wouldn't it?

What type of law do you practice? Say, you don't happen to work out of a bowling alley, do you?*

Thanks again, Ed. Your message means a lot. Have a great holiday season.
Bobby
(*Sorry, couldn't resist that.)

Dear Bobby,
 I practice mostly criminal law, which in my town means primarily drug cases and driving while intoxicated. The prosecutors and the cops have the upper hand here, but there is still a small shred of logic which lets me negotiate better deals at the margins. I fear for society if things get harsher and the poor lose all hope in justice. 
 Good luck with what you are doing there. I was a musician in high school and I know what a transformative experience music is to the soul.
Ed
 
 

Hi Ed,

Good to hear from you again. It is reassuring to know that there are still some people willing to fight the good fight despite the odds mounted against them. It does seem that we as a society are treading very shaky ground where the justice system is concerned. As always, it is minorities and the financially challenged who suffer most from the vagaries and inequities of this derelict system. I see a direct and indirect correlation with the level of fear in this country. Most of what we are fed is bad news, glimpses of the worst aspects of humanity reflected in the most unflattering light. The result is that most everyone is suspicious and afraid of one another, and that gets in the way on any concerted effort to fix what's wrong.

Yes, music has been one of my saving graces. If you would like to hear some of it, there are some free tunes available at White Dog Music.

Bobby

How are you doing?  I was listening to one of your free demo tunes, "Big House Blues", I thought it was pretty good, some good guitar licks. It reminded me a little of Stevie Ray Vaughn , one of my all time favorite guitarists, I used to practice all the time, to try and capture his sound, but I never could, you do a better job than me, putting that blues sound out than me, I just wanted to tell you, I think your a pretty good guitar player, good luck.

The rock group Journey was great, but they did not become great until Jonathan Cain formerly a member of "The Babys" became there keyboardist, I dont' know if you have heard any of his stuff. He is a great song writer, I think he is the best next to wakeman from "Yes". What do you think?

ok, i have a couple of questions for you. Is it true you knew frank zappa? And if you did, did you also know Steve Vai, the best guitarist in my opinion, in the world and ever.  The reason I ask is I know frank taught Steve the basics, but I know Joe Satriani taught Steve the rest of his knowledge, but I was wondering if frank zappa also taught you, it says you found a guitar in the attic of your house and taught yourself is that true?

And when you get out of prison, what will be the first fun thing you do besides family and friends, disneyland or superbowll,lol?

Tom

Hi Tom,

Your questions have come faster than I could keep up with, so I'll try to catch up by answering them all in one shot. Thanks for your patience.

It is an honor to be in the same sentence with Stevie, if not necessarily in the same league as a guitarist. I never tire of listening to him play in his recordings. Nice to think of Stevie and Frank jamming together in Heaven. Actually, Stevie's style is much different from mine. The thing that we have most in common is playing from the heart. A lot of guitarists think it's all about learning the licks of great guitar players. For most of the great guitar players, however, it's more about playing with feeling, spontaneity and imagination. Like B.B. King, I have just a few signature licks that I keep putting together in different ways, along with some free improvisation.

I have not heard a great deal of Journey's music - mainly just their hits. I agree with you about Cain - a great pop rock keyboardist and song writer - but it was the symbiotic interaction between his keyboarding and Niel's guitar playing that most contributed to Journey's great sound.

I knew Frank on a casual basis. When I was 16-17 I used to follow him around, haunting his early recording sessions with the Mothers and, when he would let me, hanging out at his apartment listening to the wild-ass tapes he made. I was in awe of his musical talent, ability to lead unruly musicians, and his musical vision as a composer. He also made me laugh a lot. As you note, I found a guitar and taught myself to play. When I first knew Frank, he was just beginning to pick up the guitar. At that point, I was a better guitar player, but his musical knowledge was miles beyond what I knew. He wouldn't let me join the band - he said, because I didn't know how to read music.

After family, friends, and Disneyland, one of the first things I'm going to do is get a dog and take a nice long walk. Then maybe I'll start a new band.

Bobby

 
Hello Bobby --- just a quick line to say hope you had a good (belated)
birthday!
 
Dank 
 
 

Thanks, Dank. I think birthday greetings are better when they're late. Just when you think it's over, there it is again!
Bobby

 
Bobby,
I was wondering if I can burn you some c.d.'s and send them to you? 
If so tell me how to go about it. send you some good tunes ..let me know. 
Peace brother..
Cody j.
 
 

Thanks for the offer, Cody, but no - the prison wouldn't let them in. It would sure be great if they would. Barbara's been wanting to send me some of the compilations she makes, too. I'm just going to have to get myself out of here so I can catch up on all the music I've been missing. There's a public broadcast station in my area that plays a diverse and unusual selection of music every night. That helps a lot.

Peace,
Bobby

How do you feel now about having been a part of Charlie Manson's Family? I'm only curious because I watched Helter Skelter today and I've been doing research on it since I got done watching it. I know it may be hard to look back into that time of your life. If you don't want to respond to this email..that's fine with me...you don't have to. If you don't want to answer the question...please email me back letting me know. It's alright with me if you don't feel comfortable with that. I'm glad to hear that you are married. Congratulations.

Brittany

Hi Brittany,

Your curiosity is only natural. The best way to satisfy it is by checking out the web site more thoroughly, reading the interviews and articles, etc. Doing this will result in a better answer to your question than I can give you in the space of a single email message.

Avoid accepting the impressions you got from watching that atrocious Helter Skelter movie. It was a film made for the sole purpose of milking a profit from tragedy by exploiting the fears many people have. The characterizations bear little resemblance to the real people. It is truly a gawdawful movie in every possible way.

Bobby

Hello Bobby,
 
I plan on ordering your CD in the near future but was wondering if you knew where either a VHS or DVD version of the original film can be obtained, or the entire Magickal Lantern series(Scorpion Rising, Lucifer Rising, Inauguration of The Pleasure Dome)? Thanks.
 
Sincerely,
Chris 
 

Hi Chris,

A company called Fantoma Films has contracted with Kenneth Anger to release all of his collected films on DVD. I have been in communication with the producers, and have provided them with some content for the project. The anthology (two volumes) has been in production for quite awhile, and should be nearing completion.

One of the biggest problems the company has faced in developing the anthology is getting the necessary clearances for all of the recordings of popular songs Anger used as soundtracks for some of his films (he had not obtained formal licenses when he made them). Another problem was the deterioration of some of the films. The project's producers have spared no effort in obtaining the best available prints and painstakingly restoring them to their original image quality. Hopefully, the last music clearances will be obtained, and the anthology will soon be showing up on shelves in the shops.
Bobby

 
Hey Bobby,
 
I have the Lie cd, is it you that does the vocal harmonies and lead 
guitar parts?
 
I play in a band in Australia called The Charles Manson Experiment. If 
you're interested and able you can download our version of Cease To 
Exist from the online group:
 
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Charles_Manson_And_The_Family/
 
or the band's online group:
 
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/charlesmansonexperiment
 
 
Cheers,
 
Cassidy x:)
 
 

Hey Cassidy,
You're more into the Charlie Manson thing than I ever was.

I didn't do much singing when I sat in with the Family Jam on occasion, but you can hear some of my lead guitar playing on a few of the tracks on the LIE album.

Bobby

 
 
hi bobby,
 
 i hope that one day people will see the light and let out the
family. my thoughts and prayers are with you,
 
bob
 

Hi Bob,
Thanks for your good thoughts and prayers.

There really isn't any "family" to let out. Just some individuals with bittersweet memories linked by tragedy.

Bobby

Dear Bobby,

It's me, Dan again.  In case you don't remember me we corresponded briefly about music and anti-French patriotism and such.  I also said that I wasn't going to bother you with shit about the Manson case.  UNfortunately, that is the subject of my email.  You see, I personally don't believe that Manson had anything to do with Tate/Labianca.  I've studied the subject backwards and forwards and it just doesn't add up to me.  I recently got into a heated arguement with some friends about it who wouldn't listen to my side at all.  I explained my reasons and backed them all up with facts.  Regardless, they ignored everything I said and just kept barfing out garbage like "Manson is evil," "Manson is dangerous and is where he belongs," and what got me most of all, "Anyone who believes Manson isn't evil and dangerous or believes he MIGHT be innocent is clearly a white-trash retard and the vicitm of some serious brainwashing."  Everytime I stick my neck out and express my belief I get beheaded.  Now, I remember in some interviews you recall Manson as being at the very least an oddball.  My question to you is would you ever venture to say that he was evil?  I hate to bring up such a redundant, potentially painful topic, but I need the opinion of someone who knew him.

Thanks and sorry to bother you,

Dan

Hi Dan,

It's good to hear from you again.

First a little piece of advice: If you are worried about getting your head lopped off, stop sticking your neck out.

Now, as to the question of whether or not Manson is evil, that depends upon one's definition of evil. The one I like is one I heard spoken by spiritual author Gary Zukav: "Evil is the absence of light." Do I believe Manson to be a person within whom there is an absence of light? No, I do not. By the definition I prefer, evil is a behavior, a quality, a state of being - not the being itself. Ask me if I think some of Manson's actions were evil and I may answer differently.

What I think you are really asking has to do more with guilt or innocence than evil or good. Some people think these terms mean the same things, and they do not. Guilt and innocence are terms with more ambiguity, and therefore can be applied more inclusively. They lend themselves more to shadings of interpretation, and there are vast legal systems devoted to just that. It can be argued that nobody is totally innocent or totally guilty. Some claim we are all born with sin! But again, guilt and innocence are temporary states of being, not the being itself, but a condition of being.

Let me put it this way: Charlie Manson did not actually kill anyone, that much is well known, so we can safely say that he is "innocent" of the act of murder. However, as self-described patriarch of his self-defined family, he bears some of the responsibility for the actions of his "children" who were acting in behalf of his interests, and certainly with his knowledge. To that extent he is "guilty" of murder.

For some people that may be enough of an indictment to warrant being thought of as purely evil. If so, there are a whole lot of evil people in the world, all the way up through the ranks to most of the world's leaders. So thinking in terms of people being good or evil is one sticky wicket. A lot of people love to hate their "icon of evil." Better keep your neck pulled in on that one, Dan.
Bobby

Dear Bobby,    

you don't know me but i'm 15 years old and one day i was snooping in my grandmas house and a found a copy of Helter Skelter and i was looking at the pictures and than i saw you and i thought that you looked perty cool. I hope you get out of jail soon, but if you don't i'll visit you when i'm 18, well i hope you and your family have a wonderful chrismas. also write back to me when you get this.

 Thank you for writing, and the nice things you said. A good Christmas to you too. Write to me again when you turn 18. I'll be about 60 by then.

Bobby

Are you aware that your incarceration caused the sharon tate killings?

If you believe that you would go for fried ice cream. I think they're selling some of that around the corner.
Bobby

 
 
Bobby,
With Yule nearly upon us, I thought I'd drop you a
short note to say that as a born and raised pagan, I
absolutely appreciate you and your Lady keeping true
to yourselves and not going the great american cop-out
route of claiming a conversion to christianity.
 
I also wanted to say that I really like your music!
Very impressive, haunting, and lovely. Thank you for
having samples available.
Ashlynn
 

Ashlynn,
My pleasure making the music available. Thank you for enjoying it, which gives so much more meaning to its existence.

The term "pagan" derives from the Latin word paganus, meaning "country dweller." It became a rather derogatory term used by the Church in reference to the "unconverted" who held to their earth-oriented spiritual beliefs. In that sense the term does indeed apply to me, and to Barbara.

While I relate well enough to the essential teachings of the Christ, I have no need for the brand of salvation offered by clerical traditions. I have no problem with reconciling my appreciation of the sages' spiritual teachings with my leanings toward pagan systems of belief that encourage reverence for the spirit within all things in the natural universe, in the here and now.

Namaste,
Bobby

Dear Bobby,

This on-line interview taught me things about electronics that I did not know I did not know! You have done your time, and have a contribution to make outside the walls.

Sincerely,

Tom

P.S. I threw an old copy of Bugliosi's book in the fireplace

Tom,
Ah, that's what I like to hear. One less copy of Helter Skelter in existance can only make the world a better place. Thanks for that.
Bobby

hello bobby i don't know what my chances are that you will receive this or even respond but    i'm giving it a try i'm reading helter skelter now for my third tim
e i'm a fan in reading true crimes and the manson story is one of my favorites and i've always wanted insight from the people who were involved such as their track of thinking at the time and their track of thinking now. . .    

thank you jessica

Jessica,

The sort of insights you are interested in are not to be found in the book you mentioned. We will be updating the site every so often. Check in once in awhile and read the articles, Dialogue, etc.

Here's an article that offers a rather refreshing perspective on those times, people, and events:

The Manson Myth

This is not an endorsement for all the views expressed by the author, but the article does shed some light where needed.

Bobby

Bobby,

 You have always intrigued me over the years ever since I first read of you in THE FAMILY.

Why?  Because you were close to some things, largely in the Bay area that have fascinated me to this day.  The best way that I can put it is the notion that there was, briefly, a psychedelic/shamanistic culture with no barriers and anything was possible.

At times I am sorry I missed it. Then I think of you and the mistakes that I would have probably made if I had been there.  I might have gotten close to beauty and power but, most likely would not have appreciated it or used it wisely.

Ah Bobby, youth is wasted on the young!

Hope you and the wife have had some time together over the holidays.

Stay strong!

Gary,

Thank you for the kind thoughts.

In those brief days you refer to we gave birth to something new and magical. As you note, some of us were not wise enough to integrate it peaceably with the existing culture. But perhaps a glimpse of the possibilities was all we were supposed to get at that time. That sort of shift and leap in consciousness must be allowed to evolve in due course. Nothing has been wasted.

Bobby

Right now I'm listening to Larry Coryell's 'Spaces'. Coryell performs with McLaughlin on it.   The title comes from an old piece of advice by Miles Davis: "don't pay so much attention to the notes, but also listen to the spaces between the notes. I don't know how valid that is, but for jazz it sounds about right- maybe. I got into jazz by listening to McLaughlin-Mahavishnu, Herbie Hancock, Chick Corea, and accidentally named one of Corea's albums. In late 1977 or early 1978 I was at a club in the East Village  NYC watching a Punk band. A guy was standing next to the mixing board who looked disturbed. He said he was Chick Corea's manager and he was trying to think of a name for Corea's next album, due in the summer of '78. Awhile later I asked him, "doesn't the singer look like the Mad Hatter?" He laughed and replied, "thank you!". The next summer Corea released an album called "the Mad Hatter".

 You've been a musician/composer for what, 40 years? You must know what you're doing.

I tend to agree with Miles, regarding spaces between motes. To give weight and significance to a string of notes, don't just make it louder; frame it with not-notes. The black spacious absence of sound is the canvas upon which the musician paints. It is important to allow the music to breathe, to define context and meaning by punctuating the space with notes. Music is akin to crowd noise when all the spaces are filled in.

Bobby

I DON’T REALLY KNOW WHY I AM HERE AT THIS SITE:  PERHAPS IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE FACT THAT I JUST FINISHED WATCHING THE JEREMY DAVIS FILM OF HELTER SKELTER (TO ME, HE DID A PHENOMENAL JOB AT PLAYING MANSON)  I DUG OUT MY OLD COPY OF HELTER SKELTER AND HAVE BEEN READING IT AGAIN.  I REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME I READ IT YEARS AGO THINKING, “WHAT A HANDSOME MAN BOBBY BEAUSOLEIL IS.”  IT’S A CLUSTERFUCK OF A STORY AND I CANNOT EVEN FATHOM BEING THERE IN THOSE DAYS.  I HAVE AN ORIGINAL LIFE MAGAZINE W/MANSON ON THE COVER THAT I FOUND AT AN ANTIQUE STORE IN ABERDEEN, NC, WHEN I WAS THERE GOING TO MORTUARY SCHOOL AND I TRY, SOMETIMES, TO IMAGINE THE POWER HE MUST HAVE HAD.  YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL BARB, AND CANNOT IMAGINE AT THIS POINT THAT YOU AND BOBBY COULDN’T HAVE THE MOST NORMAL LIFE ON OUTSIDE. I WOULD REALLY LIKE TO START A DIALOGUE.  SINCERELY, KIMBERY

Kimbery,

Jeremy Davies did a phenomenal job playing a Manson that bore little resemblance to the person I knew. This is because he based his characterization on a video interview during which Manson "play acted" the role of evil incarnate ascribed to him in Bugliosi's book. In other words, Davies' performance was based on a performance - but appropriate for a film so out of whack in it's portrayals of the events leading to the tragedies and the people involved.

For a different point of view, check out Denise Noe's article The Manson Myth.

Bobby

Dear Bobby :

I ran across a article on the internet with your picture and some of your music and was

impressed  with your handsome  features .TOO BAD THAT YOU ARE MARRIED!!!  let me introduce myself properly , I'm a travel RN and on an assignment in modesto , California .I

have always found  the manson family story fascinating , although I don't condone your actions in murdering innocent people. I can understand how anyone could get caught up in

an occult with ultimate control of your thoughts and actions .My ex-husband kind of had that effect on me and it took many years to break that control of mind and body . I would like to be a friendly e-mail  pal if that is possible ...

 Debbie

Too bad for who? There's no bad in it.



I made a very unsound choice decades ago, and did a bad thing. But not because my mind was controlled. I have never been in a cult. There are many misconceptions about what happened and the people involved. A more accurate representation will emerge in due course. Hang in there.



Bobby
 
 

Dear Bobby,

My name is Emma Collins and I am thinking of writing a book. For years I have been interested in the Manson story but feel not enough has been written about the accomplishments and what happened to those involved. I know if I am interested others will be too.

I think your story is an inspiration to those individuals who have made mistakes that cant be

taken back.

I am serious about the book,

Sincerely, Emma

Emma,

Emphasizing the positive is something we can all stand to do more of. Thank you for your interest, and good luck with your project.

Bobby

merry xmas, happy new year, i just bought an acoustic ovation celebrity edition, electric, i just started playing again and i am better, every time i quit i become better when i start, what do you think of ovation guitar and what musicians music do you like to listern to?

tom

Hi Tom,

I have always like the Ovations, even the quirky solid body electronics of some years ago. Ovation has never been afraid to innovate, and I admire that.

The same thing happens with me. Every time I quit playing for awhile and come back to it later there's a new freshness to my playing and I improve as a musician. Can't say as I know why that is.

Bobby

Hey Bobby,

  Ever try an old Les paul through an old Marshall,Voxac30,or Fender Twin?

JH

JH,

All of the above. Mucho ballz!

Bobby

Hello Im listending to yours mucik for the first time,thx for good things and god bless you both.

Im Felix born 1949 and got some hippe time even living in Iceland in old days.

thx again for all good things which is done.

bye Felix

Thank you, Felix. It is our pleasure to know you have been touch by our efforts in a good way. Iceland rocks!

Bobby (with Barbara)

Hello there,
I was impressed with Bobby's story via the web-site. I am wondering what his chances are for parole? He appears to have spent a considerable amount of time incarcerated and put back a lot of his experiences into helping others-especially young people.

My best wishes

Simon

Hello Simon,

It suddenly strikes me as interesting that many people tend to refer to my parole outlook in terms of "chances", as if it is like a lottery. I suppose that's as good a way of looking at it as any. I have given up trying to figure out how that mechanism works. Although I have great confidence that my prospects for release from prison are excellent, I must relinquish having any direct control of how and when that eventuality will occur, while keeping my focus on being ready for it.

Thanks for writing.
Bobby

Greetings from Philadelphia.

Just wanted to let you know how thrilled I am that Lucifer Rising is on CD. Matter of fact, I just purchased a copy online.

I was living in NYC from '77-'86 and was one of the lucky ones who bought the original vinyl album at a Kenneth Anger showing. Coincidentally, I was going through my old records a couple of months ago, found yours, pulled it out and it is still scratch-free. I wanted to listen to it again, but no turntable on my system.

I guess the point is,

Needless to say, I found the White Dog site while searching for Lucifer Rising. After 20 or so years, your music has never left my head.

I ordered a copy and cannot wait to listen to it. I anticipate fond memories to come to the surface.

Thanks,

Mark

Mark,

Thanks for writing. Keep that old vinyl album safe. From a sound quality point of view the new CD release is vastly superior, and there's much more to like in other respects as well. Let me know your take after you've checked it out.

Incidentally, I've got a new release coming out in the very near future - Dreamways of the Mystic. It will debut at my first gallery art show taking place March 3-26 at Clair Obscur Gallery in Hollywood. The reception/release party is to take place Saturday evening, March 5, in case this is in your neck of the woods. The new release has a more modern sound compared to Lucifer Rising, as you would expect (we can't live in the past!), but there is some definite presentational continuity between the two titles. We should have a new listing for it on the site in April.

Thanks again for making contact.

Bobby BeauSoleil

Bobby, thank you for the music. Please tell me about the work you did with Dennis Wilson. Thanks.

You're welcome. Dennis and I were just friends. We jammed together in the Family Jam a few times, with Charlie, and I sometimes accompanied him on guitar when he began writing his own songs, working out his ideas on the piano. This was at his little studio apartment in west L.A., where he lived after he had used up (some say "blew") his Beach Boys money. We did not actually "work" together per se.

Bobby

i have been reading a lot on the whole manson family thing...how did  a nice guy like you get messed up with them.....? im glad you found your wife and your life is going better. good luck

Good question. I'm in the process of writing a book to answer that very one. Thanks for writing.
Bobby

Dear Bobby,

I think it's amazing what you have been able to accomplish in music behind bars. I can't picture any one else ever doing that, especially completing a full score movie soundtrack.

Is it true that you were in the band Love.? I really liked what I have heard by them and was wondering if there is anything available of you with them. I'm involved in music myself. It's a bit of a struggle, but I hope that I can make a whole career out of it as well as my artwork. I did draw a picture of you from the late 60's. I had to do an exam for school on events of the 60's and 70's as far as hatred and intolerance related events. I chose KSU, Tate, Civil Rights, Protests, etc. I did a lot of artwork for visual aids, but wrote absolutely nothing about the events I chose, I knew all the events off the tip of my tongue and squeezed the

whole thing in in about a hour ( I even provided a soundtrack of songs I picked out myself).

My classmates and my teachers were stunned by every thing overall that they had me come into their other classes and do it for other people as well! Unfortunately, I had so many problems going on in my life with my mom abandoning me ( I still help raise my brothers and sister), friends dying, and tremendous amounts of pressure that went on for so long, that the school couldn't tolerate it and i had to sign my withdrawal papers. But in good things, I've had some moderate success with my art/ music ( I had Rock Hall willing to sponsor one of my pieces and i have a piece that's been featured in the Cleveland Museum of Art, People/Cleveland Magazine, and have also had the Doors "who are one of my favorite bands" sign my artwork)

I'm just old enough to buy beer now and I was wondering if maybe you can give any advice on how to help expand my career a little more. If you can write back to me when you have a chance it would be much appreciated.

Thanks,

Ryan

Dear Ryan,

Now that you are old enough to buy beer, my advice is, don't. The stuff is overrated - and it sure gets a lot of people into trouble.

Actually, I haven't had so much success that I feel qualified to offer much in the way of advice. But for what it's worth, my advice is that you do what you love - what you feel passionate about - and try not to worry too much about "making it". That part will take care of itself if that is your destiny.

For music, get yourself a decent recording setup. These days (unlike when I was your age!) it's possible to make very good recordings with a modestly priced system built around a computer. Record your music so you have a way to share it readily. Get your music out into the world any way you can and be open to what it gives you back, including the criticism. But put it out there only when you know in your heart it is speaking for you. Otherwise you only add to the din.

For visual art, do the same. Put it in a form people can seen and reveal it to the light of day.

Do what you love and the world will find you when it's ready. And when you are.

Bobby

hi mr. beausoleil: what, if anything, would you have done differently way back when? actually, do you ever really look back?

peter m.

Peter,

Of course I do. Doesn't everybody? Backwards, forwards, all around. There's something to be learned from every experience. Given what I've learned, if I had it all to do over I would probably do everything differently. But then it would be someone else's life, and I would not want to trade in what I've learned for another.

Bobby

Hello Bobby,

I would very much like to buy  the lucifer rising poster and was wondering if you could autograph it for me? How much would it cost for an autographed poster?

Thanks,

Terri Gould

Hi Terri,

Thanks for writing. I would love to sign one of the posters for you. Unfortunately this is not possible because the posters exceed the size limt that the prison will allow in. The best I've been able to do in the way of autographed copies of things is the Lucifer Rising CDs. Tthe booklets for the CDs are within the allowed size, so I've been able to sign those. Maybe the label shoud have had smaller posters printed!

Bobby

Hi, I came across your website and am extremely impressed with how you've rehabilitated yourself.  I grew up in San Jose, California and remember those years quite well.  It's a shame that you haven't been paroled, because you've certainly done a great deal of good and made the very best of your time behind bars.

I am a doctoral student of Criminal Justice, at the City University of New York, and am presently working as a researcher for a juvenile justice commission.  I was wondering if I could either get a copy of your video series, "A Framework for Breaking Barriers", or view the videos.  It sounds very merit worthy and useful with a juvenile population.

Thank you for your time,

Aviva

Aviva,

Thank you for writing, and for your interest. You should have little trouble obtaining a copy of the series or at least a promotional video that provides a synopsis of the Breaking Barriers video series and a work book. Do a Google search for Gordon Graham and Company to obtain the latest contact information. Or call Information in Bellevue, Washington to obtain a phone number. Be sure to tell the folks there "Hello" from me!

Bobby

My name is Beausoleil and I live in California. I was just wondering if you could tell me a bit of your family history because my dads family always said there was no relation between us and you. But I know my dads family and they are not always truthful. I'm just curious. I thank you for your time.

D. Beausoleil 

Every so often I receive an inquiry such as yours. Considering the diversity of histories, I'm convinced our Beausoleil forebears were a bunch of gypsies!

My father Charles Kenneth Beausoleil hailed from Springfield, Massachusetts. Both of his parents were deaf, which precluded any oral tradition being handed down, so I can't tell you any more than that.

I can tell you that in France the Beausoleil name is as common as Smith and Jones is here in the states. Are we related? Who knows? If you go far enough back, I suppose we must be. But then, by that method of reckoning we are all related.

Bobby

Hello Bobby!

I just want to write and say how much I love your music and I think you are a genius. It is such a shame you are still in prison and I sure hope you will be getting out soon. I feel that you would be out years ago had it not been for the notoriety and connection with Manson. I just want you to know that there are people on the outside who support you and are with you in spirit. I have all your CDs, including the soundtrack for Kenneth Angers film which I have seen by the way. I am just a BIG fan and look forward to new stuff from you.  Keep up the good work.....

Berti

Hi Berti,

Thank you for all that.

The new Dreamways of the Mystic CD is behind schedule but should ship soon. Just keep tabs on the White Dog Music site for the official announcement. You already have most of the music that's on it (but not all), but it has all been unified and combined with my art series of the same title. You have never seen a CD release like this one!

Bobby

I am a college student majoring in Criminal Justice. I wish to become a probation officer and help people who have gotten into some trouble. I am a recovering addict and I have spent some time in jail myself. February first I had 25 months clean.

I am writing you because I am having a problem with my research paper. The title is "When does rehabilitation start for an inmate?" My problem is that I don't know how to write a 10-15 page paper on how for some people it never starts, the whole "revolving door" concept.

I was just wondering if you could give me some guidance or some insight on what you think.

I really appreciate your love of music. I am hoping to go to school to become a music producer sometime in my life.

If you could write me back sooner then later I would appreciate it. My paper is due at the beginning of March. I would also just like to be pen-pals with you, if that is O.K.

Tracy

Hello Tracy,

It is way past the beginning of March, and too late to help you with your paper. I have been very busy working on various projects (as you can see, I would make a lousy pen pal). But I will comment on your question anyway.

Rehabilitation begins for an inmate when the inmate says it does, and not a moment before. Cognitive and creative arts programs are extremely beneficial, but only if they are not forced on inmates who do not yet recognize that they could benefit by them. Before a prison inmate can be successfully rehabilitated, it is essential that the inmate was "habilitated" in the first place, and this is often not the case. Too often, great gobs of money are thrown at developing prison programs that could be excellent in the skills they may offer to inmates, but which are sabotaged by making them mandatory. Then, a few years later when the programs have limited success, you will hear people talk about how rehabilitation does not work.

The first step should be to develop introductory programs that gently lead inmates to the discovery that they can benefit by making some changes in the way they think and behave. Give inmates opportunities to discover for themselves that change is possible, that they don't have to be stuck doing the same old things and thinking the same old ways, and for at least some of them the light will switch on. When it does, an inmate will begin the process of changing even when no formal programs are availalbe. So much the better if meaningful and well-designed programs are available that an inmate may volunteer to participate in.

Bobby

i just bought an acoustic amp. it is very nice 8" speaker 30 watts power, manufacturer "crate". I ve always liked their amp products. it makes my ovation guitar sound so much better, any suggestions on strings for my guitar or pedals i could get to have more fun w/ the amp?

Crate makes excellent basic amplifiers, and that's really all you need. The rest can be done with pedals. A chorus pedal is always nice, and can work for electric or acoustic guitars. My favorite pedal is the Line 6 Pod, which has chorus, echo, reverb, etc. built in, and can really change the way your amp sounds in a lot of ways. Some of the presets won't sound very good with your acoustic guitar, though, because they were designed for electric guitars with magnetic pickups. Take your guitar to a music store and try out a bunch of devices in your price range, and see what works for you.

I have no favorite brand of strings, but I always check to make sure that none of the strings in the pack are tarnished. Always a good idea to clean your strings after playing - makes them last longer. I especially love the sound of brand new strings.

Bobby

I came across your interview in the [L.A.]Alternative press, and was extremely impressed with how forthright and well spoken you were.

A friend of my own is facing a jail term, do to a breakdown, and attempting to enter his VA hospital with a handgun.

I'm wondering what sort of things you have found to be helpful during your sentence, to stay creative, and keep your mind as adroit as it is today. I know that all prison systems are different, but if you had any basic ideas, Patrick is a fan of literature, and has been a musician such as yourself, as well as a poet.

Any information you could send would be received very gratefully. If more information regarding will help, let me know and I'll lay out the whole situation.

Thanks very much for your time. I look forward to viewing your artwork,

Hank

Hello Hank,

Thanks for the feedback.

The best thing your friend has going for him, in what he is facing, is your friendship. He is fortunate to have a friend on the outside who cares about him and is willing to offer some support. Many people who go to prison are much less fortunate in that respect, because they have effectively burned their bridges by engaging in the behaviors that brought them afoul of the law. This seems to be especially true of people with a history of drug-related problems. Every person and every situation is different. It would be impossible for me to offer real specific advice without actually knowing your friend personally. However, based on your comments about his situation, I can offer a couple of suggestions.

The first is that you encourage your friend to investigate and volunteer for any emotions/anger management or counseling programs that may be available at the institution he will be going to. Some of these programs are pretty lame in the way they are implimented, but there are almost always valid concepts and information at their core. The trick is to overlook the form of the program and focus on gleaning the information that can lead to reaching valuable personal insights. Everyone has emotions issues; it's a matter of learing how to convert them from liabilities to assets - from being the victim of one's own emotions, to making emotions a source of creative energy.

If your friend can get a guitar where he's going, maybe you can help him to get one. If not, encourage alternative forms of creative expression such as art or writing. And help him to get good books to read, since you say he's into literature. In jail or prison, this sort of nourishment is more important than ever. Many institutions allow friends and family to order books for inmates from online vendors like Amazon, and Barnes and Noble (check the rules first). This makes the process fairly painless.

All the best to you and your friend.
Bobby

Hi Bobby,

At lunch in a little Thai place in Chinatown today, I picked up a copy of the L.A. Alternative Press to pass the time while eating, and saw the Katherine Turman article about you titled No Art Barred.   BeauSoleil, I thought, wasn't that a band? And sure enough, I remembered correctly.

The story was interesting. I didn't know what had happened to the band or to you. I am fascinated by what you have been through, and how you have developed and taken advantage of your skills  in spite of the fact your movement is curtailed.  A wonderful inspiration.

I was also interested in seeing more of your paintings. I am a painter, and whenever I travel, I look for the work of local artists, which is how I came to find this article.  I have been doing some spiritual work on myself, and your painting, Dreamer, was captivating. I was also interested in reading about your process. Amazing how necessity is the mother of invention.

I read your website and it seems you are living a life  worthwhile. I admire you.  I also look forward to the time Barbara has your paintings up on the web so that I can see more of them.

Sincerely,

Sandra

Hi Sandra,

Thank you for writing.

I must clear up something. There is indeed a band by the name of BeauSoleil, a traditional Cajun band centered around Michael Doucet's fiddling and singing. His brother David is also in the band (he plays guitar). They've been around for years and years. A great band, if you're into Cajun music. If you're into wild man instrumental progressive rock with a spiritual twist, well, that would be me. Which of us was first to reintroduce the capital "S" in BeauSoleil, I can't say. This seemed to happen about the same time - perhaps a case of parallel thinking.

If you're interested in hearing some of my music, visit White Dog Music. There are some songs on the site you can download for free, and CDs are available.

Barbara and I are hoping to get our new Gallery feature up on the Beausoleil.net site in the near future. Meanwhile, if you would like to see more of the work mentioned in the article (all that was on display during the show) visit the Clair Obscur Gallery website.

I would love to see some of your work if you will email me some jpeg images.

Thanks again for your interest and for taking the time to write.

Bobby

Hi Bobby.

My name is Victoria and I am a 34 year old woman living in southern California. I was always fascinated by the so called Manson Family. I know that a lot of people do not like that particular tag, but I don't know what else to call it.:) I am writing you because I decided to start learning more about what the people involved were up to these days. I want to make it clear that what has always interested me about that particular time and scene was not the murders! It has always been the idea of how you all lived together like you did. I have always been fond of the idea of communal living and for some reason that particular group of people are endlessly interesting to me. Anyway, I checked out your website and saw that you are doing wonderful things now. You were always one of my favorite characters because I thought you were (and still are) a beautiful man who did some things when you were younger that you regret. I know that I got caught up in things when I was younger and did some things that I would never do now. Not like the "Manson Family" (sorry) but nonetheless I can understand how things happen sometimes.

Sincerely,

Victoria

Hello Victoria,

I can certainly understand your interest and fascination. Though I was not actually a regular member of the commune, I was a close friend to the group and a frequent visitor. Within the two years prior to the tragic end, it was a lot of fun to hang out with them and play music, etc.

For decades I tried to put it all behind me, because of all the pain and regret I felt. But in recent years I have been able to reconcile myself to the fact that those times, those people and those events are a part of my history - a part of me. I have made peace with that part of my life, and have even rediscovered my affection for those people and the good times we shared, enough that I have, for the last couple of years, been writing about them for a book I plan to publish.

You are not alone in your interest. It's time the world is given an opportunity to get beyond the sensationalism and exploitation, and the fear, and begin to understand that things are rarely as black and white as we are often led to believe.

Very best,
Bobby

Dear Mr. Beausoleil

I am writing to you to say how much I enjoy your music, and to tell you how incredibly talented you are a musician.  The fact that you have been imprisoned for so long, and yet your unbreakable spirit shows thru your music.  Thank you for not letting the walls that surround you, stop your heart from creating its songs.

Rob

Thank you, Rob
Bobby

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